Be Okay

Part Five

(One month later)

I woke up that morning clearly on the wrong side of the bed. My eyelids felt like they weighed about ten pounds each. The sunlight pouring in through the window burned my eyes so I threw my arm over my face to block it out. I stood up, my eyes still closed, and cautiously walked in the direction of the bathroom with my free hand feeling my way. I still ending up bumping into a couple of walls.

Perhaps a quick cold shower would do me some good. I slipped out of my pajamas and hopped into the shower, turning on the water.  On instinct, my body first winced away once the first drop of cold water hit me, but eventually I grew used to it.

When I was finally wide awake, I turned off the water and dried myself. I put on only my boxers and took my phone. I sat on the couch in the living room and turning on the television for some cartoons. This was going to be my lazy day.

Just as I had flipped the channel to Cartoon Network, my phone rang out loudly and I groaned. I looked at the screen. I gasped when I saw that it was the adoption agency calling. I turned down the volume of the TV and pressed the accept call button.

"Hi, am I speaking to Mitch Grassi?" the female voice on the other line asked.

I nodded vigorously even though she obviously couldn't see me. "Yes, hello."

I could hear the woman through the phone. "Well, Mr. Grassi, we have a baby for you at the agency. The birth mom signed her papers so she's ready to be adopted. Would you like to stop by this afternoon?"

'She'. 'Her'. I was having a daughter! I grinned so much my face began to hurt. "Absolutely!"

The woman chuckled. "Okay, you'll have to fill out the final bit of paperwork and then she's yours."

I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand but I didn't even notice. It couldn't believe that the day had finally arrived. It had been a really long ten months of filling out a novel's worth of paperwork, being constantly evaluated to see if I was fit to be a parent, baby proofing virtually anything that could be potentially dangerous, and doing a lot reading on raising a child but it was all worth it now that I could finally have my baby.

It was truly a miracle, and maybe even dumb luck, that this was even happening. Especially considering that I was a single, homosexual man in his mid-twenties, my chances were very slim.

I picked up my phone and sprinted to my room to get dressed. I made sure sure to dress extra nice today in the best way that I could; I put on a light blue long sleeved button up, a twenty-dollar black blazer I got on sale, and my black jeans. After doing my hair, I smiled at myself in the mirror. I actually looked like a presentable father.

The bus ride to the agency felt like it took hours even though it was only about a half hour. My tapped impatiently. I was seated at the very front seat so that I could get off right away. I just couldn't contain my excitement. I was dropped off about a block away from the agency so I speed walked the rest of the way there. I hoped I wouldn't be too sweaty and gross.

When I made it to the lobby of the agency, I cautiously walked up to the secretary at the front desk.

"Excuse me," I said.

"Just take a seat," she said unenthusiastically, not even looking up from her magazine.

With a scowl, I sat down in one of the chairs to wait. Subconsciously, my foot began tapping on the floor again.

Around me there were only a few other people, what appeared to be two couples, and a single woman. They all appeared to be slightly older than I was. One of the couples glared at me criticizing as if I didn't belong there. The staring made me really uncomfortable but I did my best to tune it out. I didn't care what these people thought of me, no one could love this baby Like I Can (by Sam Smith).