Unrequited

Chapter. 5

Hey guys. 

bye

lol

baffle xx

I was taking my things out of my locker, still a bit shaken up from the things that happened, still shaken up from the things that girl made me feel, when Gale appeared by my side. She tapped my shoulder lightly.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hey,” I said.

“So, Harry’s giving me a ride home.” She smiled and it lit up her whole face. “Want Harry to drop you off too?”

The last thing I wanted is Gale’s boyfriend giving me a ride home, but I didn’t tell her that. “Oh, that’s really cool, but I….” I looked down at the floor, trying to conjure up an excuse. “But I need to finish something in the library, you know, teachers love giving loads of projects and homework and stuff haha.” I added a forced laugh at the end.

“Yeah,” Gale lingered there a little bit more, like she wanted to say something else. She settled for, “well, I’ll catch you later.”

“Yeah,” I turned back to my locker. Sometimes, looking at Gale hurts so much, it hurts even physically. I closed my eyes and when I opened them again, she’s gone. Good.

……………

I decided to walk home instead. At least this way I get to watch the sun retire for the day, watch it finally have its rest.

When you come to think of it, I’m 6 feet tall, but I’m small, so small I don’t make any difference in earth. I am smaller than half a dot in this earth. We all are. So it strikes me as so amazing how the sun is even bigger than the earth, and yet it still rests. It still retires for the day and lets the moon take its shift at night. And that just makes me think how stunning it is, that rest, something you couldn’t grasp or squeeze, an abstract noun, is still greater than the sun. Because the sun it needs to rest too.

It’s so amazing, the metaphors you can create, when you’re alone with your mind.

It’s so amazing, how it can all make you feel so tiny, so, so small.

I could never understand how some people exude arrogance, how some people think and feel like they have something, something to boast about, how people think they’re so great, how people can be so prideful, when in reality, they don’t even take up half a dot in this earth.

So maybe that’s why I fell in love with Gale, because she’s the most down-to-earth person I’ve ever met. She doesn’t boast. Not ever. And I like that, no---I love that, a lot.

………....

When I finally get home, my mum encapsulated me in a warm embrace. “Hey, sweetheart, how was your day?” She looks tired, worn out and…..And old. I’ve never really seen my mum as old before, never, I’ve always thought she looked vibrant and young and maybe, maybe it’s me, maybe I don’t pay much attention, maybe she never did look vibrant or as young as she did when dad was here. When dad was with us.

I feel guilty because these days, all I ever seem to be thinking about is Gale. “How’s Gale, sweetie?” My mum asked, taking a sip of water and then laying it back on the coaster on top of our living room table.

“She’s good.” I take mum’s almost empty glass of water and I went to the kitchen to refill it.

“Is she going strong with her boyfriend?” I return back to the living room and hand to her the now full glass of water. “Thanks.”

“I guess so.” I didn’t….Well, I didn’t really know what to say, and I guess that was the best I could come up with.

“Good.” And I see her beaming, a joyous tone in her voice. Mum…Well mum likes Gale, she likes Gale a lot, but only….Only as a daughter, or maybe a very much younger sister, but a future my-son’s -girlfriend? Well, not so much. My mum’s never told me this, but I know….I know mum doesn’t like Gale for me. She doesn’t want me to end up with Gale. And I know that when your mum doesn’t like a certain girl for you, whether it be Gale, the girl isn’t meant for you. I know that. I know Gale isn’t meant for me. But what comes with love are pain and agony and…and Inevitability. When you love someone, you love someone and you can’t do anything about it. Inevitability.