I'd had the feeling that someone was following me all week.
You know when you can feel someone stare at you, but when you look, no one is actually there? That's how it was. I could feel the back of my neck tingle, but every time I turned around, the space behind me was empty. No one was stalking me, and there wasn't a monster lurking in the shadows. It was starting to make me paranoid.
But I didn't have to be paranoid. After all, as a new idol, it was probably a paparazzo or a sasaeng fan. A really determined one, if my hunches were correct about being followed all the time. I'd felt the feeling back in the dorms as well. It was unnerving, and I felt hunted.
"Jungkook, don't forget that we have a photoshoot tomorrow morning," said Namjoon, the leader of our group, poking his head in the doorway of the bedroom.
I nodded tiredly. How could I forget? We weren't allowed to eat anything too processed or salty today, in case of bloating and breakouts. My stomach longed for pizza, but there was nothing that I could do about it.
"You okay?" he asked out of nowhere, startling me a bit. "We're watching a scary movie, and I know you usually love those."
"I'm just feeling a little tired and stressed, that's all," I replied, shaking my head and yawning, covering my mouth with one hand and rubbing my eyes. "But thanks for being concerned."
Namjoon gave a knowing nod before leaving to return to the movie. In all honesty, I was feeling tired and stressed. Stressed because I felt like I was being followed and tired because I was stressed.
I laid down on my bed and stared at the bunk above it. It wasn't as dramatic as staring at the ceiling, but hey, I was the bottom bunk. I couldn't see the ceiling if I tried.
Get some sleep, I murmured in my head. You won't look good if you're dying of exhaustion tomorrow.
I thought about Bangtan's first performance last week--one of my favorite memories--and quickly drifted off into temporary death. Not dreamland, because I didn't have a dream that night, but I found that much more comforting. I slept soundly in solid darkness, which was the best kind of sleep. It was the most relaxing kind.
"Wake up, Kookie!" I blinked open my eyes to see Jimin, the second youngest member, flinging his body on top of mine. He landed on my stomach, forcing all the air from my lungs. I groaned loudly. That woke me up fast.
"What-" As I regained my breath, I felt Jimin's extremely defined abs rubbing against my stomach as he flailed around, giggling like a cross between a toddler and a madman. Even through two shirts and bedsheets, they still felt extremely prominent. My eyes widened at the pleasant surprise.
Damn, I thought, he's fit. I wouldn't mind-
With a start, I realized what I was thinking and abruptly stomped on the brakes of my train of thought. With a flustered, shaky breath, I pushed the spastic boy off of me, who cackled as he rolled onto the floor, and hurried to the bathroom, my ears burning cherry red. His laughter echoed behind me as I shut the door. After a few deep breaths, I composed myself and started to get ready, pushing the prodding thoughts about what I had thought about Jimin's body to the very back corner of my mind. Nope, I wasn't going to think about it. Ignore. I was just tired, so my mind must've slipped.
Spitting toothpaste foam into the sink, I refused to think about how incidents like that had happened multiple times before. I didn't need to. As I scrubbed my face, I reassured myself that it was probably just the hormones acting up. I was still fifteen, after all. It was normal to be slightly curious. It was part of the process. It was fine.
