"Yah, here's your breakfast," called V as he swung open the basement door, sauntering inside. Atop the silver tray sat multiple zongzis, milk, and chopsticks. He tossed me one of the rice triangles wrapped in bamboo leaves. We began eating in silence, only the noises of nourishment sounding the cold basement.
Ever since the last experiment--ever since I kissed him--V had been overly nonchalant towards me. He'd acted like nothing had happened, and I didn't know how to feel about that. On one hand, I was annoyed, since he was acting like a curt teenage boy, but on the other hand, it gave me hope. Maybe he really was a curt teenage boy on the inside, and at least that meant that he was human.
"Are you bored here?" V asked all of a sudden. I looked up from my zongzi.
"A little... yeah," I answered quietly. To be honest, I was always bored out of my mind. I didn't know how I survived such boredom, and I usually spent the time daydreaming, choreographing dances to songs I remembered, coming up with random songs, and thinking about my life. After time, though, it got incredibly boring. I didn't know how I survived.
"Alright, here." V took a pile of stacked newspapers, books, and pens and threw them onto my bed. They clattered as they bounced on the mattress, pens spilling off the sheets and books falling out of place. I stared at the mess, stunned.
Entertainment?
I usually didn't read nor skim newspapers for fun, but now, I could feel myself tearing up at the sight of them. All I felt was a rush of gratitude. Dire situations made you grateful for many things, even if they were outdated and usually too boring. It didn't matter how boring and monotonous those readings would be--I would read every single one.
"See you for lunch." V began packing up the plates and utensils onto the tray. With light steps, he scaled the basement stairs and exited, letting the door fall closed by itself with a slam.
I immediately dove for the pile. I raided the newspapers first, since they were my only connection to what was happening in the real world. Sorting by dates, I peeled open the newest paper and took in the smell of ink and the outside.
I miss you a lot, world, I thought wistfully, closing my eyes as I buried my nose in the paper. Please wait. I will return soon.
When I reopened my eyes, I was mere centimeters from the headline. I went a little cross-eyed reading it, and when I did, I felt my stomach drop with dread.
Missing Idol's Family Commits Triple Suicide and Group Disbands
It didn't have to be me. It could've been any idol, but idols didn't go missing that often. As a result, it was hard to pretend that it wasn't me that the newspaper headline was talking about, but there was a picture underneath that showed a family picture and one of Bangtan, the family that had committed suicide and the group that had broken up.
Oh my God, I thought. Everyone's... Everyone's gone?
I continued reading, breathing in short, staccato pants. It wasn't me, right? It could've been any of the other guys, not that I wished it on any of them. It just couldn't be me. Maybe we were secretly related or something.
Bangtan Sonyeondan's Jeon Jungkook has been missing since Bangtan's latest promotions.
Or not.
After his disappearance, there were vigils held and #findourkookie trended on SNS worldwide. The rest of the group have held teary interviews explaining the situation, and the public has been in a frenzy since. The barely fifteen-year-old has left an obvious impact with his absence, and it is clear in the events of last weekend.
Last Saturday, the teenage idol's parents and brother were found dead in their home. Officials have confirmed cause of death for the parents to be poisoning, and the brother to be fatal wounds to the chest with a kitchen knife, all of them suicide. Following the tragedy, Bangtan decided to disband after another suicide attempt by Park Jimin, who was reported to be closest to the maknae. Park has checked into a mental institution, and sources say that the other members are being treated in therapy.
I could barely finish the last paragraph, as my eyes had overflowed with tears, and I was shaking too much to hold the newspaper properly. The paper drifted from my trembling hands and fluttered onto the cold floor, in contrast to the way that I felt my heart had smashed against the floor and broken into a million pieces.
My family was dead, my friends were falling apart, and I couldn't do anything about it. I was locked in someone's basement--someone who I had feelings for--and I couldn't seem to escape. I was alive and--for the most part--well, but no one knew that.
Was this all my fault?
A scream escaped my throat, raw and primal. As it reverberated throughout the basement, I heard every bit of pain and desperation in it, the pain amplifying with every repetition of the scream. The echo only made me feel worse, as it only confirmed how bad things had gotten.
"V!" I screeched at the top of my lungs. "Get me out of here!"
My voice broke with emotion, and I let out another wail. Picking the newspaper back up, I saw the printed faces of my loved ones. With a sob, I crumpled up the paper and pelted it across the basement with all my might.
"Let me go, you fucking monster!" I shouted, barreling to the door and slamming my fists on it. "I want to go home!"
I pounded my fists against the door until they turned purple with broken capillaries. With a cry of defeat, I collapsed onto the ground, sobbing onto the floor. It was cold against my skin, and it brought me no comfort.
"I just want to die..." I whispered, staring into space. I felt my heart beat in my ribcage, and for the first time in my life, I just wanted it to stop. The constant pulse made me remember that I was capable of feeling the worst pain in the world, and I wanted to end it right there.
"You do?" V's voice was muffled by the closed door. "Specimen... has emotional... capability... and is easily... affected by... others..."
"What are you doing?" I mumbled. "Just let me go. Everything is ruined. All I want to do is kill myself."
The door swung open, and in sauntered the boy. "Well, I won't let you, because I love you!" V exclaimed cheerfully, wearing a painfully stretched smile. "This might be one of the most successful experiments yet! I've discovered a fatal human weakness!"
Experiment?
I glanced up from the floor. "What... What are you talking about?" I murmured.
"This was all an experiment!" He shook his head like it should've been obvious, but all I did was gape at him through tear-stained eyes. "The newspaper was fake, Kookie."
"Are you fucking kidding me?" I rose, clenching my fists. Anger boiled in the pit of my stomach, and it threatened to spill.
Playing with emotions was one thing, but he had taken it too far this time. I'd believed that my family was dead and my friends were in great need of emotional support. I had wanted to kill myself, and this was all a fake?
"Of course!" V beamed brightly. "You've given me great results! I love you, Jungkook."
Yeah, right.
"What's wrong, Kookie?" His eyes went doe-wide. "Don't you love me too?"
I had feelings for V, no doubt about that. I didn't know if it was love, but I knew at that moment that hatred was not out of the question. I hated him for kidnapping me, I hated him for keeping me hostage, and I hated him for manipulating me. It didn't matter if I could ever love him, because right now, I hated V.
"No," I spat, unafraid of angering him anymore. "I don't love you. You can't just convince someone that their family is dead and expect them to love you back, V."
V's smile turned into a stormy scowl. His eyes flashed with rage, and I felt like I was going to be melted by his gaze. He glowered at me, and all of a sudden, I was afraid again. He looked downright murderous, and that was directed to me.
"You'll regret this, Jeon Jungkook. You'll regret not loving me."
