Sickly Love

A Broken Heart Clatters When It Beats.

*Hope's POV*

My eyes were closed.

I was alright.

And this constant beeping was bugging me.

I didn't feel like opening my eyes yet. Bitter sweet memories ran through my head. My dad. My ex. Everything from bitter to sweet. Yet these memories felt more sweet than bitter at the moment.

I felt different, maybe even something I haven't felt in months. Happy... But how was I happy? I haven't been happy in months. And when I say months I mean months.

But the months dragged by. Making minutes feel like hours. Hours feel like days. Days feel like years. And the black memories flashed though my head giving me some sort of darkness. Darkness I knew well. Very very well.

It was the kind of darkness that you fall into. You fall deep into a hole that is filled with your darkest memories. Making you live them over and over again. And on the nights when you have nothing better to do than think, over think everything. You run through your regrets and shame yourself for everything. This is only the easy hours in depression.

It gets worse.

It gets to the point where the regrets and memories got so bad that I ended up doing insignificant but deadly things that may lead to an end. For example everytime I got into a car I wouldn't buckle. Just in case if we got into the car and got into an accident everything could be over. The misery, everything.

Like I said insignificant but deadly.

*Leon's POV*

I was walking down the white hallways that I knew well. I was in and out of this hospital for years. How could I not remember these hallways by heart? But I carried on down the hallway, the sound of my IV drop rolling behind me.

I made my way down the hallways and finally came to the door. The door was slightly open, showing part of her bed. Her feet were tucked tightly with sheets and the sides of the bed had the guards so she wouldn't go anywhere. The only thing is she hasn't moved for a month or two now. She's in a coma. They think that maybe she will move but no, she hasn't.

I pushed the door open slightly and sat in the uncomfortable chair near her. Her room was crowded, but not by people, by get well gifts. She had balloons and flowers everywhere. She had piles of cards and drawings people brought to her.

Her name was Veronica. I knew her well.

I have always known her well, for God's sake we grew up together...

Our moms knew from the start we would love each other. Yes, I loved Ver, but notice I said loved not love. I didn't love her anymore. I actually had a burning hatred for her, now it's more of a soft disliking. I feel more guilt then hate towards her, but I shouldn't feel guilty. She broke me. I didn't break her.

But in a way I did break her... But she broke me first. So it's fair right?

*Flashback*

"Leon, I have to tell you something." She was sitting on my lap watching a movie that was in TV. I was to amazed by her beauty that I wasn't watching the movie. I was just staring at her.

"Yeah?" I responded after a minute or two.

She got off my lap and sat down on the couch. She was farther way from me now, and she hadn't look at me since she moved over to the couch.

"I have to tell you this. I'm just being honest. You have to understand me and forgive me once I tell you. Do you promise?" She said quickly, her nervous hands reached for mine. Her eyes were filled with plain guilt and I wasn't ready for her to tell me whatever she was going to tell me.

*End of Flashback*

"And I still don't forgive you Veronica."

And it was true I didn't. I did not and will not forgive her. What she did to me was wrong.

I got up and walked closer to her bed. And looked down at her. I took her hand in mine.

"I loved you Ver, but you broke that. Take care." And with that I walked out.

It was easy to walk out. Yet as soon as I walked through that door my knees felt weak. I kept walking until I got to our room. But instead of walking in I stood in the doorway and looked in. Seren was sleeping.

So I just stood there and looked in the room. The quiet room. It was all different, different then it was when I first met Ver. She was awake then. She was lively then. She was beautiful then. I loved her then. But now she's in a coma. She's half dead. She's pale and deathly looking. But I dont love her.

And I won't ever again.

I looked over at Seren. Her and her sleeping face. Seren was awake. Seren was lively. Seren was beautiful, beautiful didn't even explain her. But I couldn't love Seren. She would never love me back.

I couldn't love Seren.

And I didn't love Seren.

And I wouldn't love Seren.

I just couldn't.

And I wouldn't.