Nerd Helper (Editting)

Chapter eighteen

Today didn't go as I expected, I planned on avoiding Matt and apologizing to Nathan but nothing went my way today.

My first class was physics, I HATE PHYSICS,I never understood anything about it. I took a seat far at the back so I won't be asked to answer any questions and to top off the start of my horrible morning Matt was in my class, just great. He'd usually not show up at all but guess today's an exception for him.

Cue eye roll.

He took the seat beside me, I quickly got up and moved to the seat next to the windows and door. He didn't follow me, he just sat there and looked sad, hurt, guilty.....

NO NO NO I AM NOT FEELING SORRY FOR HIM, HE'S A JERK.

I couldn't concentrate I felt his eyes boring into the back of my head. The classes I had Nathan and Matt weren't in them, I was kinda relieved at least I could concentrate.
During lunch I couldn't eat, I was too busy looking for Nathan. He wasn't at his locker or the science lab, I was tempted to check the boys rest room but I wasn't that desperate. The whole day passed and there was no sign of Nathan, I felt deafeted.

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I stared at my ceiling while I thought of what to do. Should I call him? No that didn't work, maybe I should go to his house? Maybe he doesn't want to see me. Right now I miss my inner self, she'd know what to do, I know she can be bossy, pushy and a bitch sometimes but she was there for me when no one was.

I know you might think it's a little sad and creepy but hey people handle autophobia in different ways. So don't go around judging me.

  I really miss her but looks like she's gone forever. How about if I-

DING DONG DING DONG.

I wonder who that could be, I'm the only one at home.

Maybe its Nathan.

I put on my jean shorts, a purple tank top, sneakers, ran a brush through my hair and tied it into a pony tail. I practically flew down the stairs with a grin as I opened the door. My grin dropped into a look of disappointment, it was Matt at the door, I was about to slam the door in his face but he stopped it with his foot.

"Please Crystal I'm sorry, can we talk?"

"Because our talk ended so well the last time", I said in a sarcastic tone and slammed the door. I trudged back to my room disappointed, I looked out my window Matt didn't leave he sat on the ground under my oak tree, I bet he'll leave in five minutes.

He's been sitting there for an hour and the guilt is starting to eat me up, he just doesn't give up does he. Once I opened the front door his eyes lit up.

"You only have a minute", I said in a stern voice as I sat beside him under the tree.
He looked up to the sky and took a deep breath before he began.

"Remember when I caught you talking to you talking to yourself", I answered with a small nod.

"I wondered what's wrong with her? She's so different? What's she doing people are watching? But you didn't care that's why I like you, you're unique, you're amazing, you're you. I've always wanted to ask you, why do you do that?"

"Well umm... I have slight autophobia,
when Nathan left and you made fun of me I was alone. And when my brother came along my parents practically forgot they had another child, I had no one so I created my inner self, I know you might think it's weird but she helped me through the toughest years of my life. So I don't care what you or anyone has to say about it", I turned my attention back to him. He looked pale and depressed like something was actually eating him up inside. Soon he got his composure and straightened up clearing his throat.

"Oh..... okay, I-I also need to confess about something...."

Yaay more confessions woohoo
(Note the sarcasm)

"....the reason I called you Weirdy was so people would think you're weird, so no guy would like you, so no guy would ask you out. And any guy who tried I'd beat them up and chase them away", I looked at him in disbelief, he looked so guilty I could see the guilt emitting from his body. I was practically boiling with anger, if I was a cartoon character there would be steam coming out of my eat.  And then it happened.......

I slapped him.

I looked at a shocked Matt who held his cheek and down at my red hand. Did I slap him that hard?

"I know I deserved that", he stated rubbing his cheek.

"I'm sorry, I just...... I just had to let it all out", and honestly I felt a lot better. I wasn't as angry as before, looking back at all the information I just processed it's actually pretty funny.

I think I'm insane.

"I know what I did was stupid and horrible. I did it because I was a coward, I was afraid to tell you how I felt, but everything I said at the party was true", I was sorry for him, he was really hurting. I put my hand on his shoulder and smiled at him.

"Matt I know what you did was stupid, you did it for love and I forgive you. But the thing is I don't like you that way, for years I thought I was cursed because of you, I hated you , I thought you ruined my life but I didn't hate you because of that , I hated you because you left me, you were my friend and you made fun of me. But it was for the best, if that didn't happen I would have never met Whitney and Sam, so thank you", he smiled at me.

"Friends?" he says as he held out his hand, I smiled at him.

"Being friends with the school bully? I have a reputation to keep you know".

"Oh and hanging out with the school weirdo wouldn't disrupt the social scale?" he retorted playfully.

"But we'll make it work", I took his hand and shook it. He got up and dusted off his jeans.

"Well, see you in school Weirdy. Hope you and Nathan make up soon", he smirks before he leaves. I stand and dust my shorts when I see a figure leaning on a lamp post.

It was Nathan, he had a sad look on his face and his hands were in his pockets, he saw me talking to Matt. I ran towards him and started rambling like an idiot.

"Nathan I'm so sorry, I wasn't going to kiss Matt, he told me he likes me but I don't like him that way. I tried to apologize in school, come to think of it where were you? I looked for you at your locker, science lab, the library, the cafeteria, I was so desperate I almost when into the boys bathro-"

I was cut off when I felt a pair of lips pressed against mine,it was so soft and smelt like cinnamon. It was Nathan he was actually kissing me, before I knew it I was kissing him back. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he wrapped his arms around my waist. It was actually happening my first kiss, it was amazing, magical,it was suffocating. Turns out I ran out of air, I didn't want to but we had to pull a part, I smiled at him.

"That was a really nice way of telling me to shut up".

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