Control Love

belief and hope

One thing I will never be able to understand is why wait so long to tell someone you don't feel the same?

I hoped and prayed each and every day for us to be together. Each and every day my feelings would grow and each and every day I would love him a little more.

I know he was only trying to be 'friendly' not saying anything that would hurt me but I was a big girl I could take a rejection it's not that hard.

This is where he told me that he never wanted me to feel the way I did for him. When it was all too late.

He said he was sorry if he made me think otherwise. I was hurt very hurt. But obviously I didn't want to show it. I had to understand where he was coming from. After all you can never force someone to love you even If you tried and that's what I learnt.

One thing that I loved about myself was that I was always honest always honest about the way I felt, maybe a little too honest. Maybe I should never have said anything at all, maybe I should never have sent that friend request 3 years back.

Never regret though because I still believe that everything happened for a reason. At least I would like to think so.

I thought to myself every single day that he was the one for me, I have already believed and excepted it that he was the one for me and that I was going to be with him. I decided, without giving my heart a chance to speak.

How was I ever going to get over him? He belonged to me end of story. Did I not ever ask him If I made him uncomfortable? And if I bothered him or not? Sure hell I did. But him as the angel I know never bothered him. He was perfectly comfortable.

I had patience alright. Maybe I didn't know the entire story. I didn't want to believe that he didn't have feelings for me and that was it? Why wait for years to let someone know? I didn't want to end it there.

Hey peeps;
I never got a reply so I decided to keep on.

Please let me know your thoughts feel free to drop a comment or message!! Dying to know.

Take care!!

Faisaxx