Teen Idols And Happy Meals

Whipped Cream and Mix Tapes

Jacen’s POV

I never knew it was possible to be so numb it hurt. Every second without Nikki was like a shot of Novocain, draining the feeling out of my extremities and leaving me with so much aching nothing. Every thump of my heart longed for her, calling out brokenly. Nikki. Nikki. Nikki.

Some might say I was being dramatic, that I was romanticizing this. And maybe they would be right. All I knew was that I wanted to be with her, hold her in my arms, feel the rough silk of her hair sliding through my fingers, the softness of her delicate lips against mine. I wanted to hear her voice; a voice so beautiful and wise it had made me believe in greater things. I wanted to gaze into those eyes, the exact crisp shade of leaves in fall, or molten honey. The eyes that never looked at me with judgment or greed; just a kindness so fierce it sent shivers down my spine.

I wanted her. All of her. For as long or as little as I could have her. Nikki had become my everything. She steered my life, gave me love when I had forgotten what it felt like, gave me guidance when I was lost, gave me light in the dark. She was my compass. My true north.

Zenith, my North Star. A blazing light of good in a world of so much awfulness. When the world went dark, there would still be her. Always her and no one else.

I loved her, of this I was sure. Of course, that didn’t mean I’d become a lunatic – at least not more of one. I didn’t have to spend every waking moment with her. A few days without her, I could handle that; I had before. But this time was different. Now I was here and she was there and she needed me.

How could I bear the distance, knowing that she was out there, in pain? Ever since the secret had gotten out, I had worried constantly for her. Every time I saw her face on TV, heard them spew lies about her – a scalding rage would fill me. I could only imagine how bad it was for Nikki, out there in the world alone. Nobody to understand, nobody to take pity. Just the judgment and questions and scorn. Nikki didn’t deserve any of that.

Five days. It had only been five days since I saw her last, but it felt like an eternity in purgatory. But thankfully, my salvation was on its way. Tonight I would see her. I would hold her in my arms, kiss her and beg for the forgiveness I didn’t deserve. I would promise her – I would swear to her – to always protect her from the world I had exposed her to.

Pulling on my jacket, I went over to the vanity in the corner of my dressing room. It was a mess of empty McDonalds cups and loose pages of my script. I had never been entirely sure what the purpose of a ‘vanity’ was, but I preferred to use as a desk regardless.

Pushing aside papers as I searched for my keys, I happened across something else; a thin, clear CD case. I knew immediately it was not mine; after all who really listened to CD’s anymore? I picked it up to examine it. Scribbled across the front in red sharpie were numbered country songs.

I laughed to myself. All my favorites, written out in cute shorthand. I smiled, turning it over to see that there was an inscription.

Now when you hear them, you’ll think of me

-Forever Yours

I smiled to myself. Only Nikki. Only Nikki would make a mix tape, of all things. I had no idea how she had managed to get it here, but I suppose she was no longer invisible to the people of my world. Unfortunately.

I put the tape inside my jacket, having located my keys. I picked up my keys, letting them jingle in my hand as I turned for the door –

And stopped dead. The handle jiggled and in came none other than Rosalyn, wearing street clothes, or what passed for them. Her shirt exposed her midriff and so many diamonds drenched her body she’d get shot dead in a second if she stepped foot on a city street.