Hard to Love

Chapter three

**Niall’s POV**

It’s been two weeks since the incident with Dez and Alexis in Starbucks. Dez has been around a bit, but hasn’t brought her up or even mentioned her at all, and I’m too scared to ask him. I mean, he got mad at us when we were just talking in a coffee shop, imagine how he’d freak out if he knew that I’ve been thinking about her. Besides, she probably doesn’t even like me. She’s probably forgotten about me, and found another guy by now. I mean, there’s nothing special about me, I’m just Niall and she’s… she’s perfect.

“What’s on your mind, mate?” Liam’s question snapped me back to reality. I look around and see everyone looking at me.. Even Paul and Dez.. Great.

“Oh… uh… nothing,” I stammered. I could feel my cheeks getting red. I hate that about myself, I can’t get away with anything.

“HE’S THINKING ABOUT A GIRL, I KNOW IT!” Louis shrieked from the corner.

Crap! How does he always know that? I think Louis knows more than what he lets on, and then just acts like an idiot. I could feel myself getting redder. I look over at Dez and he’s giving me a look signalling that I should keep my mouth shut, then I look back at Liam and he’s giving me a quizzical look, but there’s something else… what does Liam know about it?

“No, just really missin’ me mum, ya know?” I covered. A look of relief washed over Dez’s face. I could feel a pit of anger and frustration forming in the bottom of my stomach. What’s wrong with me? Why is Dez trying to keep her away from me and the lads? We’re not bad people, sure, we like to fool around, but we’re young lads. I should talk to him about it; maybe he’ll see it from my point of view.

“Hey Dez, can I talk to you for a minute?” I called over.

“Yeah sure, what’s up?” he asked.

“Alone… I don’t want the others to hear,” I whispered.

He shot me a skeptical look before following me out into the hallway. I heard Liam ask Dez if I’m alright, only to get a shrug from Dez. Leave it to Liam to always worry about us. He really lives up to his “Daddy Direction” nickname, and sometimes it’s really friggin’ annoying. Like right now. How stupid of me to think I could have a conversation without anyone bugging me.

“Okay, what’s up? Is everything okay?” he asked as soon as the door slammed shut behind us. I had to stop myself from laughing at him for being so worried, and then I remembered why I called him out to the hall. I could feel my heart beating in my chest. This just might be the stupidest thing I have ever done. Well, here goes nothing. I sucked in a deep breath…

“I would really like to see Alexis again. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her and I promise you I’m not a bad guy, I won’t do anything to hurt her. I just really want to see her again,” I blurted out. I stared at the floor, embarrassed. I feel like I could cry right now and I don’t know why. I only looked up when I heard him laughing.

“I know you want to see her again; everyone else can see it too. You’ve been acting different ever since that day and Liam was worried about you. He came to me and Paul about it, asking if we know if anything happened. At first I didn’t put it together, but then I saw you creeping her twitter and that’s when I realized that you like her,” He responded.

“Oh… So I guess the others know about her now too, huh?” I asked, disappointed.

“Well they know that something has been bothering you and I did tell Liam, but he promised not to tell anyone. He said something about he’s not making the same mistake twice,” Dez explained.