"I wish I didn't break up with you. Your smile was always so bright, it lit up any room. Your humor could make a devil smile, and you always knew how to make people smile. You cared so deeply about others and I wish I knew why you thought nobody else reciprocated that. I'll always love and mourn for you Elizabeth Jane Cambridge"
My ex posted that on my Facebook today.
I dated Jake for almost a year and a half. He was the first guy I kissed, the first guy I slept with, and the first guy I fell in love with. He meant the world to me. Until he broke up with me in the cruelest way possible a month ago.
*flashback*
"Hey Laura! Have you seen Jake anywhere?" I shout over the pounding bass, trying to spot my lovely boyfriend of over a year amongst the dozens of gyrating bodies.
"Last I saw he was out back with a couple guys!" She shouts back, then proceeding to toss back another shot. I thank her and head out the back doors, looking for our school familiar football jersey.
The second my foot hits the back porch I hear it, moaning noises coming from the dark corner to the left of me. I do a quick scan of the yard, not seeing jake anywhere and my heart plummets to my stomach knowing he could be to the left of me. I fearfully walk over to where the noises are coming from. He must have heard me walk over because before I even reach him he's already looking at him, a lopsided grin planted onto his face.
"Hey babe." He causally states. As if there isn't a brunette slut laying underneath him.
"In case you couldn't figure it out already, were over" I spit out, pivoting on my heel to go find Laura and leave this party. A tear leaks out of my eye, followed by another.
*Flashback over*
He tried to win me back, said he was drunk and wasn't thinking straight. He tried to woo me before realizing it wouldn't work and he gave up and left me alone. He was my first love, and I didn't think I could ever forgive him for cheating on me. Drunk or not. He swore he was still in love with me, and part of me still loved me too.
I thought because he cheated on me he was over me. I thought he would move on from my death just as easily as he did our relationship. I thought he wouldn't mourn for me. Holy hell was I wrong though.
I wish I could put my head on his chest and feel his hands wrap around my waist again. I wish I could hear him whisper "I love you" one more time in my ear again.
I miss the comforting arms of a boy I knew really well and whom I really loved.
