love sorrow and pain

memories

U never knew that with the simplest of words
U brought back the hurt
He left like they did and you knew that
He stabbed me in the fucking back
Little by little I remember those words
" Ok tell her I'm sorry she doesn't have to choose family is more important so u guys take care of her make sure she doesn't cut ok tell her I am sorry u won't have to hear from me anymore ok bye"
Abandoned by him, my father, my bother, and my mother
All you did was bring all that back up
Slowly you'll see I'll stop being me
I wear the mask so you don't see
The pain the hurt that's inside me
You only know what I've told you
But slowly I'll show you how fucked up I really am
I am not normal
I am not human
I am not beautiful
I am not good
I am a worthless tool
Used for hurt only
You don't see the real me
You see what I allow u to see
But I will never let you see the REAL beast in me
Forgive me I am sorry
But it's the way I'll always be
You don't know the real me
You see the smile
You see the future
Yet all I see the pain hidden beneath
You will never understand
You will be okay
I on the other hand will always stay this way