If Looks Could Kill (a short story) #Wattys2015

i

Liam.
It's the only thought in my mind as i sit, slowly tearing myself apart in the cold, darkness. This is where I use to come with him. We would sit on this very log that is now damp from the rain that had fallen that evening. Now it is night, and the stars that normally shine are concealed in gloom and fog. The weather matches my mood and I cry with the skies.
Liam.
The boy who brought me joy. The boy who comforted me. The boy who was always there and helped me in times of need. The boy with the thick brown hair that always looked flawless. The boy with the warm brown eyes that sent warmth and safety. The boy who smelled of cinnamon. The boy who hugged me and whisper comforting words in my ear. The boy who I loved. Who I still love.
A pang of grief hits me as my mind lets go of the name and is replaced by a new one.
Jenna.
Her face appears in my mind and it takes everything in me not to scream. Her name races through my mind, pulling along memories that once made me laugh. Now all they do is cause more pain.
Jenna.
The girl I trusted. The girl I called my best friend. The girl who once upon a time seemed so utterly perfect. The girl that everyone loves. The girl who manipulated me. The girl who used my secrets against me. The girl who stabbed me in the heart but made sure I didn't die. The girl who glowed in my pain. The girl who stole Liam away.
And my mind races again. I wage a war inside my head and tear myself apart, longing for nothing more than to curl up and die. To have Liam by my side, pulling me from the darkness. To be in Liam's arms, inhaling his cinnamon scent, and sharing his warmth and protection.
Liam.
Where are you now? I need you more than ever! The boy who always helps is the reason I sit here wishing death upon myself.
Oh, but why am I tearing myself to shreds over a boy?
Because he was my ray of light and he promised me forever.
Because he was the boy who comforted me and held me in his arms.
Because he was the boy who knew more about me than I knew myself.
Because he is the boy who I loved- no, love- and the boy who said he loved me.
And because he turned to the girl who ripped out my heart and took all the love out of me.
Liam.
If only you could see what you are doing to me.