Savor the Moment

Chapter 21

---- 20 days left ----

I walked in to Santana's room without knocking. That was my first mistake.

"Oh gross!" I quickly covered my eyes. "Put some clothes on!" Brittany came up to me.

"Hi Lucy! Me and Santana were having sexual relations! What's up?"

"Cockblocker!" The Latina muttered from behind her.

"I need some help with something." my eyes were still covered. "But please put some clothes on!"

"You know, it strikes me that we haven't had that epic lesbian threesome you promised us if you moved in with us." Santana pointed out thoughtfully.

"Ooh! Yeah! Can we?" Brittany gave me her famous puppy dog look. It was so innocent you almost forgot what she was asking for. Almost.

"No. I'm not having an epic lesbian threesome with you!"

So you admit it'll be epic!" Santana shouted.

"How's Rachel?" Brittany asked suddenly.

"What?" The conversations changed so quickly it gave me vertigo.

"Yeah, didn't you guys have your third date a couple days ago?"

"Yeah what happened?" Santana asked.

"Shut up." I cut off the conversation. I was so not having this conversation with them.

"So is that a good shut up or a bad shut up?" Brittany asked leaning forward.

"Shut up." I looked away, but before I could stop it a giant grin broke out on my face.

"Oh my god! It's a good one!" Santana squealed. "Did you guys do it?" She asked leaning forward licking her lips, I became extremely aware the she was still naked.

"Put on clothes and I'll tell you all about it in the kitchen."

"If they get together will we have an epic lesbian foursome then?" Brittany asked as I walked out of the room and slammed it just hard enough to prove my point.

----

"Alright stretch marks. What happened?" Santana asked a few minutes later, both of them fully clothed.

"It was nice. We went on this romantic walk down the east village, where we held hands. Then we grabbed dinner at this amazing Italian restaurant. It was the best date I have ever been on. Afterwords-"

"You had sex?!" Both of Brittana asked gleefully.

"No. We got ice cream. You guys are as bad as Puck sometimes!" I crossed my arms. "Regardless, I need your help."

"You haven't kissed yet? Wow, you do need our help blondie." Santana said rolling her eyes.

"Your wife is blond!" I pointed out and Brittany nodded.

"Yeah, but she's not a useless dumb blond like you are." Brittany glared at her wife, and Santana grinned cutting off the glare with a kiss. "You're the genius type of blond." They began making out.

"Guy! GUYS!" Finally they parted lips. Santana mumbling clock locker again. "I need your help!"

"On building a time machine? Been there done that! I created three separate parallel universes." Santana and I looked at Brittany, who smiled innocently. "Santana you were dead in one of them, and Lucy you were dead in the other. I didn't like either of them very much. Don't mess with time Lucy, it's always going to mess up!"

"No, but okay... So, I'm at that stage in my therapy when I'm all angry about my life. So my therapist says to put my anger into good use like a project or something."

"Yeah..." Brittany prodded.

"Well, as I was on this date and was think about how this woman was so gorgeous, wonderful, amazing, beautiful-"

"We get you're in love, move on Tubbers." The Latina said with an eye roll.

"Well, as I was thinking all this it made me think about what kind of person would so something so terrible to Rachel as Jessie did to her."

"You want Snixx." Santana smirked.

"No, I need Snixx. Can I count on you?" Snixx leaned forward and Brittany smirked.

"Always."

"In that case! Call the glee club!"

---- 18 days later ----

Jessie St. James walked out of his house at 8pm everyday to go on a walk around the city. It was part of his evening ritual that he used to force Rachel to do with him. On this walk he saw some new pieces of graffiti. One wall had the words: LIFE IS EGGSELLENT WHEN YOUR SNIXX! Displayed proudly with yellow spray paint. Jessie St. James did not know anyone named Snixx, nor did her understand the pun so he continued moving.

As he rounded a corner the words: EGGCEPT YOUR FATE! YOU MUST NOT BE FRYTENED! Put in red spray paint were on the side walk. He didn't know what to make of it but thought it must be:

"Those damn teenagers again." He muttered but continued walking. As Jessie began to walk down the street he saw a real estate company advertisement sign say "Omletting this property slide for cheeper then usual! Get your eggstremely low prices now!" Jessie stopped and stared at this. Finally he turned to a random guy.

"Hello. Do you know what the deal is with all the egg puns?" He asked the man who stopped and looked at him.

"What egg puns?" The man asked cocking his head to the side.

"That one right over there!" He pointed to the real estate sign

"'I'm letting this property slide for cheaper than usual. Get your extremely low prices now.' Where's the egg pun?"

"Y-you don't see it?"

"See what? Do you need to see a doctor son?" The man who was much older than Jessie put a hand on his shoulder.

"N-no thanks. I have to go." Jessie speed walked away but he could feel the man's eyes on him. As he walked (read: ran like a baby) home to the apartment he turned a blind eye to the puns on his way back. Such as:
-Don't let your brain get scrambled by this
-Yolks like these are eggstraordinary!
-Your life is ova!

And many, many, more. But as he got to riverside park and found it deserted that's when he got a deep sense of foreboding. Slowly nine people crept out of the shadows led by me. Artie in the wheelchair held a video camera, and every person besides him held at least two eggs. The man with the Mohawk held a box of them and a evil expression on his face.

"Hello Jessie." I said.

"Quinn." he nodded. "So you're behind the egg puns?"

"And how eggactly you did you figure that out? I hope you didn't scramble a few brain cells in the process." Santana said. Jessie glared at her.

"What do you guys want?" He crossed his arms.

"Revenge." I said and that was everyone's queue. Soon 18 eggs had landed somewhere on his body. Puck walked up to him and looked him straight in the eye.

"You hurt my Jew friend Jessie St. Sucky! You're going to get what you deserve." And all of the dozen eggs fell on his head.

"I heard you have an audition tomorrow with a director who hates eggs. Please feel free to try and wash the smell out." Sam said and we all walked away silently pulling into our separate cars.

"That felt good." I said turning to Snixx. "Even if we do have to pay that actor on the street."

"The egg puns were a nice touch. Good job Lucy." Brittany commented and I laughed.

"I wanted to kill him when he called me Quinn."

"Hey," said Santana rubbing my back. "If he's permanently blinded from the eggs in his eyes he might fall off a cliff or something. We can only hope." She said with a small smile. I grinned.

"I'm so happy we got that all on camera!" Brittany said and she and Santana continued to make out as we headed off.