The Problems of King Wither (Preview)

Day 1

I was very hungry this morning and couldn't decide what to eat. Right Head suggested mushrooms while Left Head wanted nether wart. I floated down from my chamber at the top of the Red Fortress and tried to weigh both sides of the argument. On the one side, this season's mushrooms had been very buttery and flavorful, though nether wart made for a better breakfast dish. Eating something crunchy in the morning really wakes you up. Decisions like this often stump my advisors and me, so I ordered the chef to bring both items to the dining hall. Why choose when you can have everything?

The chef, who is a rather square headed wither skeleton, came to the dining hall with only one dish. He looked embarrassed.

"Sire, I apologize, but we don't have any more nether wart," he said, "though I assure you this mushroom soup is delicious."

It did smell delicious. I could hear Right Head licking his chops next to me. But Left Head demanded that nether wart be brought to the table. "Go out and fetch some," I ordered.

The chef shuffled his feet and would not look me in the eye. "My king," he said slowly, "what I meant before is that...well...there isn't any nether wart left in the entire kingdom."

"What!?" I shouted, spitting soup all over the table. "How is that possible?"

The chef inched backwards, looking down at the floor. "We ate all of it," he said. "And no ships have come to trade for more. Apparently the Blaze Brothers have ordered it all."

The Blaze Brothers have been my rivals, nay my arch-nemeses, for years. Just thinking about them makes all three of my heads spin. Somehow we've managed to keep the peace for one hundred years, but it hasn't been easy.

"What do we do about this?" I asked.

"I don't know, my king..." the chef replied.

"I'm not talking to you! Go away. You're dismissed."

"Y-yes, sire!" The chef saluted and ran back to his kitchen.

I picked up my bowl of soup, drank it down quickly, and then floated around the long hall. It helps me think to move. "So?" I said.

"We'll just have to wait for more ships to come from the Glowstone Port," said Right Head.

"We cannot wait," retorted Left Head. "The season for nether wart is almost over. If we wait any longer, there may not be any crops left. Then we'll have to wait until next season! The subjects won't be happy about that."

Left Head was correct. Nether wart is a delicacy in the Wither Kingdom. It's often served at birthday parties. Without nether wart cake, the children will have to eat spiders' eyes. And we all know that unhappy children mean unhappy parents. This nether wart shortage could lead to a revolt, if not handled properly.

"I agree with Left Head," I said. "If the nether wart won't come to us, we will just have to go and get it. Um, where does nether wart come from, again?"

"From the nether wart fields south of Lava Lake," Right head said, sighing. "They're near the Glowstone Port, along the Ghast River."

"Oh, the Ghast River! That's where we had our last vacation, right?" I said, trying to remember. The Ghast River is very pleasant during the winter time, though it's unbearable during the summer. Even in the Nether, things can get too hot.

"That vacation was forty years ago," Left Head answered.

"Has it been that long since we've left the kingdom?" I asked.

Both heads nodded simultaneously.

"Well," I said. "In that case, we are due for another outing! Let's go round up some wither skeleton knights, shall we?"

The rest of the day was spent making preparationsfor the excursion. I informed my loyal subjects that I will be venturing intothe unknown to bring them a fresh supply of nether wart, which received aclattering of applause from the skeletons. In total I am bringing fourteenknights with me as an escort, though I don't think we will run into muchtrouble. This is a time of peace, after all. Our biggest problem shall bespeed. The nether wart season ends in five days! We must hurry to get to theport before then, so we are prepared to leave first thing tomorrow morning.