Mated but not Tamed

Chapter 24 - Do Better

Lana

The past few weeks have felt like a storm, a dark cloud. But with a light at the other side. I hadn't even realized how much I was carrying through all this. The stress, fear, and uncertainty.

Only in this moment do I feel utterly calm. At peace. Its jarring but oh so welcome.

I feel the faint caresses of Magnolias mates. Her senses almost overwhelmed, but her soul filled to the brim with love. Our soul.

My mate's presence's surround me, but its faint without the mate mark in place. I feel almost incomplete because of it, but I can't push it. Magnolia isn't ready, and to be honest, I don't know if I am either.

I long to be with them, surrounded by my mates, fully.

After what feels like only a few minutes, I start to drift off. Swarmed by memories and moments with my mates.

My favourite dream of us running through the woods, under the light rays of sun, taking form in my mind.

******

Magnolia

The soft golden light of the afternoon filters in, dusting the counters and walls in its rays. I sit in the breakfast nook, stirring a cup of peppermint tea as I watch the wind rustle the trees just outside.

I find moments like this, when I'm alone, soothing. Yet I can't help but miss my mates. Even if they are just in the other room.

The conversation of them leaving tomorrow wasn't one I necessarily wanted to be apart of. I know what's going to happen, but all the politics and tasks waiting for them when they return became overwhelming.

Should I have stayed?

Is there some way I can help?

Would I just get in the way?

The questions became to much and I had to excuse myself.

I can feel the weight of everything on my chest, pressing down on me. It's a familiar weight, but one I feel less and less the more time I spend with my mates.

I swallow hard, pushing down the lump in my throat, but it doesn't go away. I can't help but think its for something else. A feeling warps my stomach at the thought. I'm missing something.

My head falls back against the back of the booth, the sun rays painting my face in their glow. I recede into the back of my mind, only out of new instinct to check on Lana.

She hums a lovely melody, another I am sure she made herself. I sink into it, letting the sweet notes wash over me like a caress.

The song takes a sadder turn to it. Lana humming lower notes in a crescendo of emotion. She doesn't realize I'm listening, and I use this chance to focus on her thoughts more so than her melody.

Images and memories of her mates, Sinder, Tank, and Vex play through our mind. Some are as clear as day, others blurry in areas, like there her imagination and not a reality.

The sense of loneliness washes over me, and I see things through her eyes. The memory's mixing with mine.

Me and my mates snuggling on the couch, but the view is distorted, distant. And it fades to black.

Another is of when we went for a run. Lana dodges trees and roots, whilst the boys chase her. Except when she turns around, its not her mates chasing her. Its mine in their wolf forms.

The realization hits me with the force of a freight train. My head throbbing as the pressure behind my eyes builds.

Lana hasn't had any time with her mates. Without the mate mark, she can't spend time with them unless she and they are in control.

Lana had been patient, always understanding, but I couldn't shake the feeling I was neglecting Lana in so many ways. I have been so caught up in my own problems, my pursuit of happiness and comfort, that I completely sidelined what Lana needed.

The shame that I haven't even thought about it crushes my chest.

The more I think about it, the more I realize, Lana has always been there, always supported and protected me. But lately, it seems like she's slipping more and more to the back of my mind.

A soft sound broke through my thoughts, and I looked up to find Seth leaning on the entrance to the kitchen. His massive arms crossed over his chest as his eyes eat up the sight of me.

"I made some tea," I look down at the cup, circling my fingers around the warm mug. "There still some hot water. Would you like some?"

Seth walks over to me, scootching into the booth next to me, placing his hand over mine, pulling it into his.

"Princess..." I look up into his heterochromia eyes. So similar to mine, yet so different. "What's wrong."

Of course he would notice. He has read me like a book since I got here. Never asking to many questions, always giving me a choice, knowing what I will like before I even try it. He's either a mind reader, or I'm worse at hiding my feelings then I think I am.

I huff and his lips tip up in his signature smirk. He brushes a few strands of hair away from my face as I turn in the booth, my knees brushing his thigh.

"I've been cruel, to Lana." My shoulders slump and I lean into his touch. Part of me expected him to snatch his hand away, the other part of me now knows better.

Seths grunts and pulls me onto his lap, gripping my chin to his face. His lips engulf mine, devouring me in a rough, possessive kiss.

My breath is ripped from my lungs in the best way as I melt against him. My arms wrap around his shoulders, my fingers running up his neck and into his silky black hair.

He rips away from me with a snarl, and his eyes lock with mine. Holding me hostage as I catch my breath.

"I don't ever want to hear those words come out of your mouth again." Seths voice is gravelly, his tone aggressive, but only in the way that now makes my thighs clench, and my cheeks burn.

I almost moan from the contact of his hands on my hips, and his eyes on me. So intense and sincere.

"You are the kindest soul I have ever met." He runs his fingers over my heated cheeks. "I'm sure, if something is wrong, you will be able to fix it. But don't ever call yourself cruel."

He presses his lips against my forehead, I let my body relax in his arms. The reassurance helps, but I know I'm still at fault.

Now I just have to make it better.

But how?

"Now, why don't you tell me what's wrong." Seth pulls my eyes to his with his fingers back under my chin. "Let me help you make it better."

For the next half hour, I tell him what I know, what I think, and the ideas I have to make it better. All while ensuring Lana isn't paying attention.

The fear that he'll judge me is present the whole time, but every little action he takes to distract me from my bad habits make me think otherwise.

I bite my lip, and Seth pulls it out with his thump and kisses away the sting.

I pick at my nails and Seth laces his fingers through mine and kisses each knuckle.

All his ideas and inputs show me he's actively listening and trying to help. He never judges, snarls, or looks at me with disinterest. He just... listens. He understands.

After a little while, it gets easier. Talking helps, and through it all I feel closer to him.

Lana deserves a happy surprise after everything I haven't given her. It's a start.

We brainstorm, and after everything, Seth has the greatest idea. One we put into action immediately.

Thanks for reading.