My Life Changed When He Came

Chapter Nine: Recovery

  [[Two Months Later]]    I just laid there, alone in my thoughts. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. I was alone in a hospital room with my eyes closed. 

        Days would pass by but I couldn't live them, I heard my friends and my mother come into my room but I couldn't see them, I couldn't touch them. So I laid there, listening to them ramble on about how they were worried and how they came to check on me. 

      Everyday was the same, nurses came into my room and looked at me to see if  I woke up yet which I didn't. A week after the accident, the people I once knew and loved came in and the doctor told them that I was in Comatose. 

      I wanted to get up and say that I was alright but I couldn't move a muscle, it made me want to cry because I felt so useless.  From what I heard, Ash didn't come to see me. Of course he didn't, he probably whooing some other girl so he could destroy her life as he did mine. Why did I ever fall for him?  I got addicted to drugs, I had sex at age seventeen to a guy that didn't even love me and now I'm in a coma.

       I waited until the day that I could wake up and walk out of here. 

     My mother came today, I heard that she brang flowers with her. They smell nice but I can't see them, roses I think? 

     ''The doctor said that you're getting better. He said that you might even wake up soon.'' From what I could tell from her voice, she smiled. I would've smiled back but I couldn't. 

      Her hand touched mine. ''I'm so sorry that I didn't come find you, I just thought that you were off at one of your girlfriend's house.''  Her voice got a little sad, she kissed my forehead, softly. I missed this affection, after I was eleven it stopped because to me it was being ''babied'' . 

    I wanted to hug her tightly and say that it was all my fault because it was, but I just laid there on my back. Her soft hand stroked my cheek. I would've broken down in tear and fall into her arms but I couldn't, I heard Arsen come in because I recognized his footsteps. 

    He cleared his throat and my mother left the room, he sat down in the chair that she was sitting in before.  ''Hey Nicole, long time no see. I just wanted to see if you were waking up but you didn't. Listen, when you kept seeing me with Amber, it didn't mean anything. We weren't dating but I was helping her get through some tough times so I apologize for making you jealous.''

     He probably looked down after he said that.  He took hold of one of my limp hands and squeezed it, he soon sighed. ''I missed you, I miss talking to you and holding you. I heard about the accident the next day so I rushed over here to see you but you weren't available.  They said that you had slit wrists, broken ribs, a broken arm and a head injury. Ash heard that it was his car that was in the accident and he was furious so I told the doctors not to let him near you.'' 

     I had slit wrists? Is that what Ash was doing to me that night, besides making me bruise some more?        

      [[Two weeks later]] I tried to move my fingers but one of them moved. It supposedly knocked the nurse off guard,''Do that again Nicole.'' now that she was focused on me, it was my time to shine. 

     I attempted to move it again and it worked. I heard her run out of the room and yell,''Doctor! Someone get Dr. O'Dell!'' They both rushed in and Dr. O'Dell checked my pulse, then shined a light into my eyes.

     I blinked at him and he stumbled back. ''I can't believe it, she's awake! Nurse Jackson, call her mother and her friends right away.'' I blinked a couple of time and tried to sit up. He gently pushed me back down.

     ''No, no. Nicole, save your strength for tomorrow. We still need to run a few tests to check on your head. Now move your fingers for me.'' I lifted up my hand weakly, I kept turning it slowly to look at it. 

     I can move!  

I moved my fingers in a strumming motion and he smiled.  My mother and Arsen came into the room and my mom hugged me. ''You're awake!''

     Arsen stood by her side and smiled down at me. I smiled back. ''I missed you all.'' I croaked, damn my throat was dry.  The nurse came near my nightstand and set now some water,''Here honey, drink up.'' I grabbed the glass and drank it quickly.

      I needed that.  

    After some hours talking to my mother, it was soon Arsen's turn. 

     He sat down and stared at me for what seemed to be an eternity. ''What.'' He soon blinked as if he was coming back to reality,''Nothing, it's just.. Amazing to see you awake. I thought that you'd be in a coma forever.'' 

     I nodded and bit my lip while looking down, I saw a huge bandage covering both of my wrists. I slightly pulled them back and saw ten cuts on both of my wrists.

   ''What the..'' Chills ran down my spine and a sudden tear rolled down my cheek. ''Why did I ever trust that monster?'' I put the bandage back to the way it was, Arsen was silent but then he spoke. ''I heard about the drugs that he made you do, he made you get hooked on them.

    The doctors didn't tell the police or anything because your mother convinced them but I told them that Ash did it. They found LSD and Heroin in your bloodstream when they got you here.'' 

   I felt more tears come but I didn't feel like holding them back, I needed to feel these emotions. I needed to feel human again. He cleared his throat,''Your mom signed you up so that you could go to a therapist.'' I held my temper, ''I don't need help.'' 

      But it seems like he lost his,''Nicole you need help! You need to stop the addiction and you've been raped by that guy! Think about all the damage that he's done to you!'' I blinked at him in full disturbance, I admit that it was eye opening but still. 

    I remember my life flashing before my eyes once that semi hit me, I remembered how happy I was before Ash entered my life. Everything was so..calm but Ash ruined everything, or did I? I sighed and rolled onto my side. ''I want to be alone.''

    He reached out to touch my shoulder but stopped, ''Nicole, I-'' ''Just please leave me be.'' He quietly left the room and I stared off into the distance. 

      Is this my life now?  

       My life was completely perfect but now my world turned upside down. I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep, I just kept imaging the crash in my head, over and over. 

      [[Nightfall]] I tossed and turned during the night, I flipped my pillow over and laid my head down onto the cold side of it. Maybe I should've stayed in the coma so I wouldn't have to face reality again but then I would've gone mad inside my own head. I opened my eyes and sat up, I need to walk around and get some fresh air. 

      That's all I need. I got out of bed and stumbled a bit but I caught myself before I fell, I walked slowly out of the room and found the balcony.  I leaned against the railing and took a deep breath of fresh air. I gave a sigh of relief.

   I'm alive and now I get to take control of my life, no one will get in my way.  I looked down at the city and saw how beautiful it was from above. 

     I felt the cold wind on my face, it was so crisp that my skin shivered but I wasn't bothered by it. I looked down again and thought that it would be so easy to jump. Just get up and take a leap of faith, one steps is all it takes.. 

    I shook away the dark thoughts and went back inside to my room. I laid back down and slept.