Is it Real or Not?

Chapter 32

Michael's POV

A week later, Carter had sunk into a kind of depression. She wouldn't eat unless I made her, she couldn't sleep, and she pushed everyone away. She stayed locked up in our bedroom or in the nursery. I was getting really worried about her.

"How is she today?" Teresa asked. Her mother had called everyday to check on her. The day after we came home from the hospital, Teresa and Andre came over to check on her and let's just say, it wasn't pretty.

"The same as she's been," I sighed. "I don't know what to do Ms. Teresa. I'm trying to be here for her but she's starting to push me away too."

"I know Michael but you have to be understanding and have patience with her. She probably feels crappy right now."

"I do too though. Doesn't she understand that she wasn't the only one who lost their daughter? I'm hurting too."

"Yeah but she was the one who was carrying the child. It affects her in a different way. Just continue to be there and give her support. She'll come around eventually."

"Ok. Thank you Ms. Teresa. I'll call you tomorrow."

"You're welcome Michael. Bye bye."

"Bye." I hung up the phone and sighed deeply. I was sitting in my office, trying to get my mind together. I haven't really had much time to think because I've been so worried about Carter.

When we first got home, she was really clingy and didn't let me outta her sight but for the past two days, she's been ignoring me. If I even try to touch her, she moves away from me. It hurts cause all I want to do is comfort her and she won't let me.

I decided to get up and check on her because I haven't seen her since I woke up this morning. I got up and walked out of my office. I walked down the hall to our bedroom and looked inside. She wasn't there so it only meant she was somewhere else: the nursery. I walked across the hall to the door and looked inside.

Carter was sitting in the rocking chair, holding a little teddy bear and her eyes closed. I could tell she had been crying because I could see the dried tear stains. I didn't wanna disrupt her but when I looked at the time and saw it was going on 5:00, I had to get her to eat something. She hadn't ate anything since this time yesterday.

I walked over to her and squatted down beside the chair. I though she would open her eyes when she heard me but she didn't.

"Carter? Baby?" I whispered. She still didn't move. I rubbed her hand and as soon as I touched her, she yanked her hand away.

"Go away," she whispered.

"Baby, you have to eat something," I said.

"I'm not hungry."

"You have to keep your strength up."

She opened her eyes and glared at me. "Go...a...way. I'm not hungry so leave me alone."

"Carter, you have to eat! You can't just stop living your life because of what happened and you can't keep pushing me away!" The tears started stinging my eyes.

"Pushing you away?" She repeated angrily. She stood up and looked me in my eyes. "You better be lucky that's all I'm doing, considering that this is all your fault."

"My fault?! How is it my fault?"

"You're the one who stressed me out so bad that day with that bullshit ass argument about us getting married. If you didn't know, stress can cause miscarriages."

My eyes widened. Was she seriously blaming me for this shit? The anger rose inside of me.

"If its anybody's fault, its yours. You didn't tell anybody that she hadn't kicked in two days and you waited to tell me that you were having pains."

"I waited because my so called "boyfriend" was ignoring me over stupid shit! I tried talking to you but you ignored me so I couldn't have told you if I tried."

"That's the thing: you didn't try. That was my child too, Carter and I would have listened if you said it was about her and you know it."

She didn't say anything because she knew I was right. I sighed and wiped my face to get rid of the tears that had started coming down.

"I'm trying to be there for you but you can't push me away. Let me help you baby," I grabbed her and held her against my body. Surprisingly, she didn't push me off her. "Let me help you," I whispered.

She looked up at me and shook her head. "You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped." She shrugged out of my arms and walked past me and out of the room. I bit my lip and started crying.

Later That Night

It was 12:24am and I was in the guest room, laying down. I had been sleeping in here for the past two nights since Carter didn't want me near her. I was laying there when I heard water turning on. I figured it was just Carter taking a bath or shower. After 30 minutes, I heard the water still running so I decided to check on her.

I got up and walked out of the guest room and down the hall. I walked into our bedroom and Carter wasn't in the room. I looked over and the door to the bathroom was closed but I could see the light under the door. I walked over and knocked on the door.

"Carter? You ok?" I yelled. I didn't get an answer. I sighed and knocked again. She still didn't answer but the water was still running. I pushed down on the door handle and the door was unlocked. I opened the door and screamed.

Carter was laying in the tub but it was overflowing and her head was just under the water. Her hair was the only thing I could see. I rushed over and turned off the water. I pulled her naked body from the tub and sat on the floor with her in my lap. She was cold and her skin was slightly blue. I checked her wrist and her pulse was there but it was faint.

"God damn it Carter," I jumped up and ran into the bedroom. I grabbed the cordless phone and ran back into the bathroom. I held her in my arms while I dialed 911.

"911, what's your emergency?" The operator answered.

"This is Michael Jackson. I just found my girlfriend unconscious. I need an ambulance to Neverland Ranch right away!"

"Ok, I'm dispatching one out to you right now. Does she have a pulse?"

"Yes but its very faint."

"Just stay on the line with me until they get there."

I agreed and waited for the ambulance to arrive. 5 minutes later, Ricky ran in with the paramedics right behind him. I got out of the way so that they could take care of her.

"Mike what happened?" He asked.

"I came in here to check on her but she didn't answer me so I opened the door and found her..." I trailed off.

The paramedics put her on a gurney and rushed out of the house. I followed close behind as they carried her out of the house. They put her in the ambulance and I climbed in too.

"Meet me at the hospital," I yelled to Ricky. "Call her parents also!"

He nodded and ran off. The ambulance pulled onto to the highway and sped off. 15 minutes later, we pulled up to the hospital. The paramedics pulled the gurney out and I got out too. We rushed into the emergency room and they wheeled her straight to the back. However, the doctors wouldn't let me go with her.

"I have to be with her! Let me go!" I shouted. Just then, I felt a strong arm on my shoulder. I looked up and it was Ricky.

"Mike, calm down. They have to stabilize her first." He said gently.

I walked over to the wall and punched a huge hole into it. I gasped and started breaking down crying. My legs gave out on me but before I could hit the floor, Ricky caught me. We slumped down to the floor together and he hugged me while I cried.

"She's gonna be ok kid," he said.

"I can't lose her too," I cried. "I can't lose her too."

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