Every Day has a Memory

Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Special—Tamsyn's POV

"I'm sorry, sweetie." Doctor Bledisloe tentative brushed his hand over my knee, before glancing away with a pained look in his deep-set grey eyes. He wanted to get out of here, I could tell, because he not only felt upset that he had just told me that I wasn't going to see out the next week, probably, but he also felt awkward.

That was a given.

I would feel awkward if I had to tell one of my patients that they were going to die.

But thing was, I barely reacted to that piece of information—I knew it was coming. In fact, I thought I'd be dead about four weeks ago, so really, I'd gotten a longer period than I'd originally bargained for, which was both a blessing and a curse.

To be honest, though, I really thought that the ol' Bledisloe was waiting for me to break down and start crying.

Instead, I just reached out and patted his shoulder. The motion was filled with awkward sympathy. "It's okay, Doc," I said, my voice cautious and soft. "You've been a good, ah, doctor for the last... however many months I've been in here. So, ah..." What was I supposed to say? Thanks for trying, Doc, but I knew I was going to die anyway?

Yeah, right.

"Thanks," I said finally.

The man with slick ginger hair nodded appreciatively, then moved from the bed to head for the door. But not without one more saddened glance back at me.

I had the urge to tell him to piss off already, but at the same time I knew why he was acting that way.

It was only a matter of time before everyone else started doing the same thing.

Then again, there were those stubborn few who would probably choose to bathe in acid before they chose to believe it—like Lachie Broker.

He was a stubborn boy, who I had adopted as my brother over the course of these past two years. I once tried to bring the 'what if I don't make it' conversation up with him a couple weeks ago when he and Micah first had their falling out, but he just told me to 'shut the hell up and don't be stupid'.

That was why I believed he and Micah got on so well—before their stupid little bitch fight.

Lachie and Micah, and even my brother, were so adamant that I was going to pull through this, when they could see me physically and mentally deteriorating right before their eyes! Not only were they being wholly ignorant about everything, but they were also complete idiots for chosing not to see the obvious.

Aiden, Lachie's twin, and Alicia, Micah's twin, had taken to dealing with my fate a little better. They'd been upset when I'd told them, but they hadn't refused to acknowledge it like Lachie and Jude.

The only person I hadn't physically been able to have the 'what if I don't make it' conversation with had been Micah. Every time I saw him, the poor boy looked like he was going to break from lack of sleep and malnourishment. I figured that if I added one more thing to his already long list of problems, Micah was really going to break.

I didn't want to push him over the edge.

My eyes snapped up at the sound of feet shuffling in the doorway. Who I was expecting to find was not who I found: Jude had been the only person I saw this morning, so to see Micah standing there instead of my brother had been a little bit of a shock. "Hey, babe," I said, my voice reaching as high as a stage whisper.

I hated that. Even my voice made me seem fragile.

I shook that thought off and studied my boyfriend.