The Night I Forgot

Chapter 3

When it was time to go to bed I was mentally deciding where Blake would sleep. I couldn't make the poor man sleep on the floor, and the tiny couch in our hotel room couldn't possibly fit his lengthy, muscular body on it. My other options were (1) force him to sleep with Anita, which would be really awkward.(2) he could call room service and ask for one of those little portable beds. Or..(3) he could sleep with me...but no touching. I decided to go with the last option. It's not like we were going to be touching so no biggy.

When it was around 11, I was about ready to pass out.

"Well, youe two can stay up if you want, but I'm going to bed," I say tiredly.

"Ok well I'll guess I come too?" Blake made it sound like a question, which made me smile. He was asking for my approval not just hopping into bed with me.

"Sure, but no touching." He laughed.

"I'm serious, I'm not a big cuddler anyways, so you're not missing out on anything," I say as we walk towards the bedroom.

"Oh. I know. You definitely weren't cuddling with me last night," he said sarcastically.

Had I cuddled with him last night? I don't ever cuddle. Do I? I always felt a little awkward when I cuddled with someone. Was he just trying to do exactly this, get into my head? Was he just kidding?

I laid on the right side of the bed, and he slept on the left. The bed wasn't too big, so I could feel him laying there. I don't know how or why but it comforted me. He made me feel safe and wanted, even if we weren't touching. I wonder how good I would feel if we were touching. If he is doing this to me without touching me, what could it possibly be like for him to touch me? Not in a bad or nasty way, but in a caring one.

I woke feeling satisfied. I hadn't had a good sleep in a long time, but last night was peaceful. I always had nightmares about my ex, Trey. Last night was the first night in a month I had a good nights sleep. I slowly opened my eyes. I nearly panicked when I saw how I woke. I was nearly on top of Blake. One of my legs was draped across his torso and my other was tangled with his feet. It felt perfect to my body, but my mind was screaming things at me. Maybe he was right last night. I was apparently a major cuddler when it came to this guy. I yawned, and forced my body to untangle with his. My body hated leaving his. His touch made me have butterflies and I just refuse to feel like this. I can't. I can't go through all the hell Trey put me through again. I can't stay married to a guy whom I know nothing about. I really wanted to break the promise I made him, and just divorce him now before I change my mind. I knew this guy had the ability to make me melt just at his touch, and that's exactly why I needed to leave.

Anyways. So I pulled myself out of bed and headed to the shower. I stripped my clothes off and looked at myself disappointedly in the mirror. I hated my body. I was always so self conscious about it. I have absolutely no boobs. It's a little embarrassing sometimes when you have a friend who has a D. I focused my attention to the shower once again. I turned on the hot water all the way and the cold about 1/4 of the way, then pulled the switch to turn on the shower. I felt the hot water run down my back. After about ten minutes I heard the bathroom door open. I totally freaked.

"Blake! I'm in here!"

"It's Anita," the voice said making me relax a little," I'm just getting me a razor." She was chuckling. I rolled my eyes, but she couldn't see that through the translucent shower curtain.

Once I heard the door shut, I stepped out the shower retrieving the towel hanging on the wall, but stopped, frozen by shock.

"Oh umm..I thought no one was in here.." I say shoving the shower curtain in front of my exposed body. I could feel my cheeks reddening.

"I was just coming to pee..." said Blake.

When I heard the door close, it must've been him coming in. I must've not been listening too well. Either Anita left the door open when she left or I was going deaf and didn't hear the door close. This just had to be the most embarrassing thing in the world. I should've been listening!!!!

"Oh......I'm so sorry. I.. I was just..." Blake stammered," here." He handed me the towel from off the rail next to him and tossed it to me. I caught it, but half dropped the curtain exposing the left half of my body. I hurried and put the towel on while Blake just half smiled and looked at the floor. Had he known I was in here and just came in to have a good look? I mean there is nothing good to look at. I have nothing. I decided against it. It must've been an accident.

I changed in the bathroom, once he left. I was still a little jumpy. I hadn't been naked in front of a guy in a while. Blake made me smile though. He didn't look at my body disappointedly like most men, but he politely looked at the ground smirking. Like he enjoyed it, which made me feel fluttery inside. At least I know he wasn't married to me for anything sexual.

I walked into the kitchen to the coffee maker. I was about to run it on when I noticed it already was. That's weird, usually Anita didn't drink coffee, unless it was one of those icy ones from Starbucks. Then I noticed the coffee beside the pot. With six sugars and two creams sitting night next to it. I smiled. This man just knew how to get to me. I put all the sugars and creams in and mixed my coffee. I walked into the small living room of the hotel to find Blake and Anita watching some kind of cooking channel on the T.V, which I found kind of abnormal. Anita? Watching a cooking channel? The girl can burn water! Then I looked over at Blake,who was so engaged in the show he didn't notice me walk in.

"Hey..?" I say a little amazed that he was the type of guy who liked cooking.

Without taking his eyes off the tv, he said,"Hey there sleeping beauty." Then he forced his eyes to look at me. I felt a little awkward knowing just a few minutes ago I was naked in front of him, but when he looked at me I saw satisfaction and a hint of desire in his eyes. The perfect combination.

Quit thinking like that Allie! You are going to have to divorce the guy! Try not to get attached and try not to lead him on.

Not getting attached was kind of hard with Blake though.

"Hey." I say trying to sound uninterested. I sat down making sure I sat on the other side of Anita, making her sit between us. I didn't think I could control myself when I was close to him. Hell! I woke up cuddling the poor guy. I probably looked like a dog trying to get the owners attention. I beat myself up for being so.....clingy.

He looked at me bewildered. My tone was probably the reason for the look.

And where I sat. Yeah, that too. I felt bad for treating poor Blake like I could care less, but I had to do it or he'd just hurt more in the end when I filed divorce.