we put the world away

nightmares

I woke up in the bed room Calum was down stairs playing Fifa I walked downstairs and he immediately said " how do you spell me?" "M E why?" " well you spelt it wrong, you forgot the D" "there is no D in Me" "not yet" " omg Calum I'm texting your mom" " omg no" he grabbed my waist and turned me around he threw my phone on the couch and he started kissing my neck and he tugged at my shirt he took his off and tried to take mine off but I just grabbed his hand and kissed him trying to keep his hands off of my shirt suddenly he grabbed my shirt and ripped off of me I screamed, "it was just a dream" I said it was 3 in the morning Calum had his arms wrapped around me he woke up when I said dream he said " babe are you okay?!" I snuggled into his shoulder " babe what's wrong?" he asked I just cried and he held me tighter " the dream " I said " babe you know I would never do that to you unless you wanted too" he said while looking into my eyes I saw he was upset " I know" he hugged me again I layer in his arms for the rest of the night and I thought I thought why did those guys pick me that night, October 23rd, I was walking home from the record store I'm only 15 and it was 6:00 I was listening to Blink 182 on my iPod I left my phone at home I was texting  Nat when 2 guys were walking up behind me of course I ignored there catcalls the kept calling me "kitten" or "kitty" I had pepper spray and I was about to tell them to Fuck off before I mace you in the face and one of the guys before said that put a bag over my head and brought me in a bar the bartender didn't do anything because one of the guys had a gun I kicked and screamed then they raped me and when they did I went crazy ass bitch mode on them I kicked one of them in the shin and I kicked one of them in he balls I grabbed my clothes and ran to the bathroom and got dressed I escaped from the back window I heard gun shots and I said " shit the bartender" so I dialed 911 on my iPod and the cops came I told the police that the raped me and they went to jail when I got to school the next day everyone called me a slut or a whore but Nat, Calum, Michael,Luke,and Ashton didn't I told all the kids to fuck off because I beat the rapists asses and I could do the same if they didn't shut the fuck up Calum agreed with me we had started dating a couple weeks after that incident and the only time he left was to go to California and we missed each other like crazy he was my home for my heart and I didn't know what to do with out him, I went on tour with the boys everywhere the boys went I went with them, mostly because of Calum but also my mother told me to watch over Michael too. Calum fell asleep not to long after I woke him up I fell asleep 1 hour later in his arms and I was happy it was his arms and not someone else's