Through It All

FOUR

It was the longest day in Sophia's life. The Willis family dedicated themselves to get everything ready for the big dinner party. Sophia tried hard to focus as Gilda gave her a wide variety of dresses to choose from and as she tried different hairstyles on her, but as much as she wanted to be optimistic, Daniel Smith's face ran through her head like a dark cloud. How could he have done that to her? To his wife? Since Daniel was raised abroad, people from this village didn't know much about him. Apparently, Daniel got married some place far away where no one was nosy enough to care.

Daniel was the only man that made her feel like she could be loved. She had just turned eighteen and she was so naïve. Daniel made her feel so pretty, and since she was excited to let society know she was available for marriage, Daniel's sudden interest in her made her so glad that she might get married sooner than she thought. But months had gone by and Sophia kept seeing Daniel as often as she could. Daniel insisted that it would be best if they met in secret for he wouldn't be able to show her how much he cared for her with a chaperone by their side. Now she knows that he didn't want to be seen being unfaithful.

She sits on her bed unable to move. She loves him. She still can't believe how blind she was. Tears start rolling down her cheeks for the hundredth time since she last saw Daniel, why did it have to happen to her? She feels so ashamed, though it did not get too far, she still felt filthy, and no matter how much scrubbing she did, the feeling will not leave her.

"Sophia?"

She turns slowly towards the closed door. "We are ready for you in the drawing room," Gilda's voice announces.

Sophia nods trying to gain some courage. She takes one last look at herself in the mirror thinking that perhaps things won't be as bad as she thinks, maybe he will like her, she smiles but then it fades, or maybe he won't. She steps out of her room running her nervous hands down her best dress. She can start over. She has to start over, and this time she won't make any mistakes.

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"There she is," she hear her father say the second the door is opened for her grand entrance. "Here comes the light of this house." Sophia smiles shyly and curtsies quietly. "Mr. and Mrs. Lancaster, I want to introduce you to my youngest daughter, Sophia Mary." Sophia turns towards the Lancaster family slowly as her father introduces them one by one.

Mr. Adam Lancaster senior is an elegant man with silver hair and he smiles greatly at her, the woman in an extravagant dress holding his arm is Adam's mother, a boy of about twelve years of age who is standing quietly behind them is the youngest son named John, and beside them, stands Adam, his deep brown eyes meet hers and she rapidly looks down at the floor feeling foolish.

"Darling," says her mother. "Why don't you play a song for us? We were just telling them how gifted you are at playing the piano." Sophia saw this coming. Playing an instrument was the way to impress a gentleman, that's what her mother always told her. Which is the sole reason why they encouraged her to learn.

She nods obediently, and walks towards the awaiting piano. She notices Lucia standing next to their mother watching her expectantly to see her fail. Sophia tries her best to ignore her.

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After she played a song, they proceeded on to giving the Lancaster family a tour of the Willis splendid house. Throughout the tour, Sophia watches Adam absently as he walked next to her father admiring her ancestors' portraits down the hall. He is a striking man, no doubt about that. He talks firmly and elegantly. He is very courteous and he carries himself with so much confidence that she finds it difficult to look away. As she sees all these wonderful qualities, she can't help but wonder if she will be even be capable to move him a little bit.