As We Fall (A Trevor Jackson Story)

Dates and Denials

I lay across my bed, trying to finish the last of my AP US History homework before I finally decide to crash. But it's hard for me to concentrate. I'm too distracted by thoughts about tomorrow. Now call me an over thinker if you want, but I'm just realizing, as I take notes on the art of writing history, that everyone meeting up at Trevor's tomorrow is coupled up. EVERYONE. Except for, of course, me and Trevor. Unless that was purposely done, and I was only invited to even out the numbers and keep Trevor from being a seventh wheel... I'm thinking about this entirely too much.

As I try to bring my focus back on my last bit of homework. My phone buzzes on my dresser next to my bed. Normally I try to ignore it while I'm doing my homework, but I still need a distraction from the side thoughts that are still in the back of my mind. Does Trevor even want me there? What do I say if we get stuck with each other while everyone else is all booed up? Why do I even care?

I shake of the thoughts and grab my phone, receiving a text from Arissa.

Rissa- Heard Trevor has a pool xp. Bring you bathing suit! That cute high waisted one with the fringed bikini top.

A ball of energy swirls in my stomach.

Don't get me wrong, I am excited about the pool, just not so much about the bathing suit. Arissa forced me to buy that swimsuit earlier this summer. She told me I looked great in it and that my old one is wack and ugly. I've only worn it once so far, when I went to the beach with Arissa and Jade about a month ago...

The suit is cute... But for some reason I wasn't too sure about wearing it. I thought about the suit, a borderline bikini if it wasn't for the high waist and the triangle shaped fringe on the bandeau styled top. It's really cute. But then I start thinking about my body, which isn't too bad considering a summer full of junk food. But still, what if it doesn't look right on me anymore? What if it emphasizes the pudge of my stomach? Or makes what little curves I have disappear? And gosh I literally have scars everywhere.

I get another text message.

Rissa-AND STOP FREAKING OUT ABOUT YOU BODY! It's freaking amazing! Just wear the suit!!!

I start cracking up instantly. Leave it to her to make me feel better about myself. If it wasn't for her, I'd probably be in a corner somewhere eating my feelings while I point out every flaw I've got.

Charity-I was not freaking out!! I was just a little concerned. But don't worry. I'm wearing the suit...

Rissa: GOOD because if you wear that ugly behind one piece, I'm burning it and forcing you to swim naked! I'm sure Trevor would like that ten times better :p

Charity-ARISSA!!

Arissa-whaaaa?

Charity- I told you I don't like him...

Arissa- yea rite

I could not stop laughing at this goofball. The messages make me feel at least ten times better. Even the mention of me liking Trevor doesn't faze me. It just makes me more excited for tomorrow. I'm almost tempted to wear the one piece just to see what she'll really do. I get up and walk to my closet, still giggling.

I dig through it until I find the suit, stuffed all the way in the back of my closet. I shake it out from the ball it was rolled up in and gaze at it. A shaky smile spreads across my face. I'm really gonna do this.

~~~~

I can't believe I'm doing this. It's Saturday afternoon. 4:40 to be exact. I know Trevor said around four, but you never wanna be too on time right? Wrong. Honestly the only reason why I'm so late is because I could not figure out what to wear over this suit.