Waterfall Eclipse

Affairs of the Heart - Part One

Chapter Thirty:

Affairs of the Heart – Part One

The following morning Rani had resumed her normal workload in Squad Six, but Captain Kuchiki wanted her to resume her Shikai training as an added session that afternoon. She made her way over to the practice grounds and met up with Lieutenant Kuchiki.

"Hello Lieutenant." She greeted solemnly.

"Are you okay Tómasu? You seem down." She asked after realizing Rani wasn't her usual self.

"Yeah, just have a lot on my mind."

"Do you want to skip today? I can put us down as a Jinzen day."

"Nah. I've been wanting to spar with you after being off for a week."

"Do you want me to take it easy on you?"

"Maybe at the start, if possible."

The lieutenant smiled. The two started to spar solely with their katanas before moving onto their Shikais. After two hours, Lieutenant Kuchiki called it a day.

"You sure, lieutenant?"

"Yes, you did great. I don't want to push you too hard. This is only your first day back in a matter of speaking."

"Thank you."

"Now, have a good afternoon. I have to get back to Squad Thirteen."

Rani made her way to the captain's office and waited outside to speak with the captain as he was having a meeting. Once cleared to go in, she did.

"How did it go?" Captain Kuchiki asked as he was signing papers.

"It went fine. Lieutenant Kuchiki decided to take it slow throughout the session and progress to Shikai."

"Did she say anything else?"

"No, sir. Nothing out of the usual."

He nodded and then dismissed her.

"Captain?"

"Yes, lieutenant?"

"Is it me or is something not right about Tómasu? She doesn't seem to be herself."

"If she has anything going on personally, I am not one to stick my nose in. However, if you are that curious, by all means go ahead and ask her. If you feel it's worthy of reporting back to me, then do so." The captain replied as he was diligently working on paperwork.

Put in his place in the captain's own way of saying "shut up and get back to work", Lieutenant Abarai continued on his work load before calling it a day. When he left, while walking on the grounds, he saw into Rani.

"Hey Tómasu! Wait up!" He called.

"Oh, hi. Lieutenant Abarai. How can I help you?"

"Man, are you okay? You don't seem yourself at all." He said then paused. "I know. Join me for dinner, okay?"

Rani agreed and followed him. They were seated in a private room so they wouldn't be disturbed by anyone coming in.

"Now, are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine. Why are you and Lieutenant Kuchiki so concerned about if I am okay or not?"

"You aren't your usual self this morning. Did something happen last night? You can talk to me, you know."

"I just have a lot going on. I'll be fine, but can you do me a favor and make sure I have something to do everyday. Free time with me is, well, unwelcome at the moment."

"Free time? You want more work?"

"Yes, if possible."

"I'll talk to the captain. Would you want a patrol in the Living World? I think we have a block coming up. I can put you down for a week or so."

"That would be nice. It's been a while since I had a long assignment over there. The last I had was two days."

"Okay, I know he was planning on working on the assignments tomorrow. I'll mention it to him and then let you know."

"Thank you lieutenant." Rani said with a smile. "Maybe if I distance myself from him, it would be better." She thought to herself.

After a surprisingly enjoyable dinner with her lieutenant, Rani made her way over to her room and got comfy on her bed.

"Long day?" Chiharu inquired as she sat next to her.

"Yes, but kind of worth it." Rani answered. "And I just had dinner with our lieutenant."

"A date?"

"No, nothing like that. He just wanted to talk." She said as she sat up. "Am I not my usual happy self?"

"You did seem to be a bit down today, but it's because of that letter isn't it?"

"Yeah, that's partly the reason. I mean he confessed to me in that letter."

"Rani, he confessed to you when he kissed you." She teased. "What are you going to do now?"

"With any luck, I'll be in the Living World. Lieutenant Abarai said Squad Six has a month to fill down there. He's going to approach Captain Kuchiki to see if I can be placed there. I might need a change of scenery."

"You just want to avoid and postpone the inevitable regarding Captain Hitsugaya."

"That too." Rani agreed. "I just can't worry about dating anyone right now, especially a captain. My heart and my head aren't agreeing on anything right now."

"That's why you're in the state that you're in. Let's think back to what Lieutenants Abarai and Hinamori said to you when you were deciding which squad to go into: didn't they both say 'follow your heart'?"

"Yes, they did."

"And did you?"

"I guess I did, and I found it wasn't the right choice. Look at all the bad I have done in Squad Ten."

"That's because, deep down, you knew you liked Captain Hitsugaya that way, and you followed your heart to him because you wanted to be closer to him."

"And what an infatuation that has become. He, in turn, apparently liked me too and I caused him all sorts of pain. I mean, seriously – I tried to kill myself. I am more trouble than I am worth."

"No, like you said – your head and heart aren't agreeing."

"But I think I can finally decide on something."

"What's that?" Chiharu asked her attention piqued.

"I have come to realize that it may have just been a crush on a person of celebrity standing. I am not worthy of having a relationship like that with a man like him. I am going to have to turn his affections down."

"But, Rani, then you won't be happy."

"I am going to have to sacrifice my happiness with regards to that part of my heart. I'm closing it off."

"You know if you do that you will never be able to look at Captain Hitsugaya again without feeling guilty."

"I already can't look at him without feeling guilty with all the trouble I caused him, even if he says he forgives me."