E-Trans: Dee Freud's version
*Hello, guys! Another AZY POV ( 1st person) chap. is here. ;) A combination of chapters 50 and 52. Thank you as always. Please enjoy the read and let us continue to support the movie/series/novel. Love lots! <3*
I know what I'm capable of.
They might say I'm cruel and disrespectful.
Could ruin and break someone's life and bones.
Be disgusted easily and defiant to others high self-importance.
People will touch my shoulder but I'll just brush it off.
Or smile at me flirty, to catch my unconditional attention...
Yet, I'll only move away.
" Since, I came from a family who has the heart to hurt anyone."
Why do I have to apologize and feel hurt with my own actions and words?
For me... this is normal.
What is there to change and be dejected for?
F>
" You're a normal man right? Tell me that you still like women, right?"
Then mum says that to me. I laughed on how ironic it is for me to hear it now.
The person that I'd become and loving him are two different things.
My parents weren't there when I needed them the most.
I kept quiet and accepted the things they've given me as gifts to make me happy.
As if I needed it...
No, they were wrong.
They are the ones that I badly wanted to hug and kiss. Tell stories about my days and nights.
But, they didn't noticed it. My parents see me...however, they are not looking at me, after all.
Grandfather was there by my side to comfort and love me which mum and dad have forgotten to do.
I am thankful for his kindness and still be forever grateful for nurturing me with wisdom.
Nevertheless, this loneliness inside me was filling me up to the brim.
It's irritating...
Frustrating...
Annoying...
But one time you knocked at my door, my life became even more annoying and...
Colorfully bright.
Is it really that good to cut-off my relationship with you?
To marry and have a child with a woman, who I don't actually have feelings for.
You should know, BXS and I were just having an agreement.
If you ever take back your words of loving me then believe it or not, I'll shackle you up together with me.
If this was a game, then I shouldn't have joke on you from the very start.
I may never realized my feelings for you at first, but whatever they may say or do now, it doesn't matter.
You're mine and I'm serious.
If they take you away, I'll find ways to look for you
Once I've found you, never will I let you go again
and wipe your tears, to see you smile as always.
"Idiot" Yes, I'll tell you that.
So you could get angry at me for being too slow and making you cry for my arrogance.
Then, I'll reply: "Yeah, I'm here now."
and kiss you gently on your lips and your warmth.
But... I can't do it today, please wait for my return.
Until, I finished this mess with my family then I'll see you and hold you like before.
They say our love is unnatural.
That falling in love with another man is utterly shameless.
That it will humiliate their reputation and standing in the eyes of the crowd.
People will be merciless and give us pain...
Suffering...
Love is... you, if not, then I won't bother with this kind of crazy feelings or emotions ever again.
You've chosen me, I've chosen you.
That's all that matters.
I want to take this love together with you.
They can't hold me as a prisoner forever, the only thing they can do is to accept and embrace the truth.
The truth that... I only love you.
F>
That's why. Remember this, if we see each other again,
I won't let you not care about me or think of me as just a fantasy.
As I stand in front of you, You should only think of happiness,
and when you hear my voice and listened to these lines:
" I am An Ziyan, just to let you know, I am Mai Ding's man. With this, you have no problem, right?"
You can't do anything else but be with me for the rest of our lives.
You could curse me...
But, never ever think that
.
.
.
.
.
I don't love you anymore.
Chapter 50/52_END
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I'll Still Love Him, Even If He's A Man: AZY's POV
FanfictionAn Ziyan's Point of View in the novel,before he and Mai Ding became lovers in the story.
