When It's Over :.A Supernatural Fanfic.:

Leaving him behind

My brother is dead. I thought as shoveled the last bit of dirt onto his grave. I know I should've given him a Hunter's Funeral but what's the point? The Gates of Hell have been permanently sealed, no evil son of a bitch is ever getting out. Every last demon on earth was sucked right back into hell. And at what cost? My brother is in hole. I looked down at the dirt and wondered what would've happened if I had stopped him? What would happen if Abaddon and all the other scum weren't sent back? What would've happened to Charlie, Kevin, and everyone else if I had stopped my brother?

"Dean?" I turned to see Castiel, the only family I had left in the world. He was off fighting his own battle with Metatron, the Scribe of God. Metatron wanted to close the Gates of Heaven and banish every angel out, but Cass, who Metatron tried to trick into helping him, stopped him.

"Sam's...Sam's gone. He closed the gates but the trails were..." I tried to explained but a sob threatened to rip out of my chest. This wasn't happening.

I got back to the bunker and drank myself to sleep...for three days. When I finally decided to get up and eat something, I staggered into the kitchen to find Charlie sitting at the table, making a burger.

"Sup, bitch..." She said, sadly. She knew.

"Hey, Charlie." I said as I wrapped her into a hug. I just held her there for a few minutes and sighed, letting her go.

"Are you okay?" She asked me as I sat down. I chuckled once.

"No, Charlie. I'm not even in the vicinity of okay. I just buried my brother. If he had just..." I just dropped my head and got out of the chair, throwing it before throwing everything on the table on the floor.

"Dean! Dean stop!" Charlie yelled from the stove, knowing not to get in the way.  I just threw a random cup and stormed out, almost running into Cass. I didn't even look at him, I just walked past him, I needed find Kevin.

I found him in the libaray, looking at some random books.

"Did you know?" I asked, slamming the book that he was reading closed. He jumped and looked up at  me, confused. "Did you know?" I asked again.

"Did I know what?" He asked.

"That Sam would die if he completed the Trails?" I was getting angry with Kevin and I knew I shouldn't be but I was angry.

"No, I didn't know. I would've told you. I swear." I nodded and went to take a shower. When I was finished, I just let the hot water fall on me and heal my swore muscles that I didn't even know I had. This wasn't fair. It should've been me. It was supposed to be me. But he was so hell-bent on doing the Trails himself that he didn't care the consequences. He didn't care that he would die, he just wanted to save the world.

I slowly walked in the kitchen and saw that it had been cleaned up. There was a burger on the table with my name written on a piece of paper in front of it. I picked up the paper and saw there was a note on it.

Had to run out for a few things. be back soon. Your kitchen is surprisingly empty. made you a bacon cheeseburger.

-Charlie

I smiled as I picked up the burger and started eating. As I finished, I thought about Sam again. I mean I hadn't stopped but the more I think about him, the more things come up. He never really cared for burgers, he was always a salad person, even as a kid. Dad even thought he was nuts. I smiled at the memory of dad, Sam, and me at a diner just eating and acting like a normal family. We were never normal I mean how could we be? We come from a long line of Hunters and Men of Letters. So we were bound to end up right here no matter how we try and fix it, the outcome would stay the same.

"Dean?" I turned to see Cass standing in the doorway. I smiled as best I could but it didn't matter. He knew what I was feeling.

"Hey, Cass. Um, I never got to ask you, how're you doing? I mean after Metatron?" He looked confused by my question.

"I...I guess I'm okay. I mean he's gone. He is no longer a threat." I nodded and started walking to my room but I stopped when I passed Sam's. I hesitantly grabbed the doorknob and turned it before slowly pushing it open.

I looked inside and saw that it was basic. A bed, a nightstand, a dresser, and a desk. I walked over to the desk and saw that he had papers all over it about jobs and the Trails and just odds and ends things. I started cleaning it all up when I saw all the bloody tissues in the wastebasket. It was almost full and I felt the anger come back as I started trashing the room. I picked up the wastebasket and threw it at the wall, scattering the tissues everywhere. I took the desk lamp and threw it too, breaking when it hit the floor. I threw all the papers and everything that was on the desk onto the floor. I kicked the trunk at the end of the bed and finally sat down on it because I could no longer breathe. I finally let the sob break free and started crying over my brother's death. I just can't handle this. I just dropped my head in my hands and let it all out.

I picked up my head and wiped the tears from my face and took a deep breath. I looked over at the mess of papers on the floor and saw a picture laying in the midst of it. I knelt down to pick it up and got a really good look at it.

It was a picture of Sam and I when we were kids. We were sitting on the hood of the impala and I sat next to dad while Sam was on his knee. We found this picture when we first started looking for dad back in Jericho.

When I went back to my room, I sat on the end of my bed and took a breath. How was I supposed to do this? I was I supposed to live without my brother? What was I supposed to do know? I guess I could go back to hunting ghost. They didn't go back to hell they never really belonged there in the first place. What about monsters? Souls that went to hell were human that turned in to demons. Monsters were never human. Well, some weren't. They never went to hell. Which means there's still a job to do.

But did I want to do it? Did I really want to keep fighting? I could go and have that normal apple pie life Sam was always talking about having? But where do I even start?