Welcome to the Family - A Yogscast Fanfic

Chapter 20 - Fluffies and Coffees

~Nee's POV~

It's Been 2 weeks since S.A.M had found me in my office. December was a week away and i couldn't help but sigh at the quick month flying past me, too fast to grasp hold. After sam Scrambled out that night i called Liam and as we drove silently at night I held the idea of doctors in my mind.

~Two Weeks ago~

"Esy...I really want to go. I-I don't want to be like-"

"I promise you tomorrow we can go, Don't worry Neela, It's-"

"It's not okay! Not everything is okay!" Tears slipping down my face as frustration vented out.

Nilesy looked at me again with a sad face, His eyes whispered that he understood.

"I don't want to be like this."

My first appointments were okay, I had managed to get quick access to a counsellor of sorts through Zoey and Liam. They both knew a really good group of helpful people so I tired to stay positive. Liam and I had to decline Kaeyi and Martyn's Dinner invite due to the tiring appointments, which made me very upset despite the reassuring "It's Fine"s coming from Martyn. I had Minor Agoraphobia and panic disorder. Agoraphobia being "A fear of places, Embarrassment and helplessness". Too easy to panic if I was somewhere I wasn't usually and too afraid to do anything that seemed...different i guess. Dr. Kilson stated it was probably triggered by a new job, New home and the stress of dealing with relationships since I hadn't had much 'close' interaction with people prior to Yogscast.

But it wasn't just that. Apparently i had suffered one anxiety attack before all of this: When I was with Josh. Dr Kilson found it in my medical records and noticed i hadn't known about. He explained (From reading the filed report) "Josh had rung up a local hospital stating Bethany Wilson was suffering what description calls a 'Panic Attack' What caused this panic attack has yet to be identified. Patient was fine after incident and has yet to suffer from more cases." Agoraphobia is also triggered by a subconscious fear of public panic attacks..

Great Right? Yeah No. I had been on medication to help and I am thinking more clearly now. Lewis and Turps know due to my medical report being updated and sent to the office but besides them only Liam and Zoey know. Zozo and I grew closer through this I guess, we have called and talked. S.A.M and I didn't talk for the rest of the week. Until Now:

"Bethany-"

"Stop." I had found Sam beside me as i snapped out of my recap.

"Look Sam. I don't think we can act like this any longer" He nodded shyly with a small 'forgive-me' smile.

"Look Nee, I have a surprise, I feel bad for everything so I-"

"Can We go to the Park outside and talk about it? I feel like fresh air." I mumbled closing the tabs I had opened on my computer.

"Sure.." We grabbed our winter coats not wanting to freeze to death. As we walked to the nearby familiar park i couldn't help but feel more comfortable. Knowing I wasn't around everyone from work.

"So Nee.."

~Meanwhile, Liam's POV~

Neela's treatment has helped a lot, No panic attack since the last one, she seems more calm and definitely less talkative but I am sure that would change soon. As i passed through the corridor hearing "EAT SHIT!" or "Hello everybody..." or even just loud laughing I had a sense of silence. Like all these noises weren't there, not being heard. Muted out in the background. I pondered about entering Nee's room, she hadn't showed up on skype for Bunny Base Recording or Cat Island. When i noticed her gone I went straight to hatfilms hoping they weren't recording.