Confessions | ✓

#10

#10

Dear Tiger,

Before I start this entry I want you to know one thing... I truly, madly love you. I won't and can't love anyone as much as I love you.

So I guess we are past that stage what everyone calls the honeymoon stage where it's all love and unrealistic amount of happiness. Nowadays we are having little arguments for even littler things...

Okay, it's not like we never had arguments. Heck, we used to have massive arguments even before we got together and even during our so called honeymoon stage. But these little arguments which aren't even 0.1% the size of our big arguments, drain me.

Nowadays I can't come up with new conversations. Maybe it's me who always did that and now I ran out of them or my brain has lost all it's power. I don't know. I'm not saying I don't know what to talk to you. It's just that even if I start something, it ends abruptly.

Before, our conversations used to flow naturally. Now it feels like there are speed breakers for every hundred metres. In the past, when I start a topic, we'll hold it and jump like monkeys to other subjects. But now it feels like we are at the end of the forest with no more trees to jump to (awful comparison, I know. But my lovely Tiger would make fun of me and laugh till the end of the world when he reads this... was it even funny for you?)

Our texts used to be so warm, full of fluff and fun. Now it's just... there. I used to read each and every text of ours whenever you weren't online. But now there is nothing special to go back and read.

I'm not saying we are falling out of love. Hell no! We aren't anywhere near falling out and there is a gazillion x infinity light years between us and that. In fact our love is getting stronger everyday. It's... it's just that suddenly we have become mature and we don't want the old childish talks anymore.

Tiger... I want it back. Those nights talking about our childhood, about our friends, our class, our happiness, our tears, our families, our family and that innocent love. I sound selfish. But I want it all back. I don't want love words. I don't want to hear mature stuff. I don't want hormones. I don't want any of those.

I just want our times back. Where talking about animes was bigger than mature teasing. Where holding hands was bigger than a kiss. Where our happiness was bigger than how we are acting to be happy. Where being two kids in love was bigger than two teenagers who are in a relationship.

I know you are confused. Because we are happy. And I know you are blaming yourself now. But know this Tiger, I took this innocent happiness from us and replaced it with pleasure. And now this pleasure is suffocating. And now, I'm asking back the innocence I threw away.

There is no fault in you. Not even one bit. Smile Tiger.

Writing this entry, I realised one thing. I influence our relationship. You do everything I ask. Please stop that. You are happy by giving me everything I ask. But you don't realise that everything I ask decreases our peace by one step. I think it's time both of us start influencing our love story.

I know I hurt you by writing this entry. But sometimes a heart to heart talk which involves pain is good than a painful life where we are trying to act that everything is normal.

We have grown and so has our love. But sometimes childish antics are more glamorous than maturity. And I know it is tough for you to take this all in and act accordingly. But that's why we are humans. We always learn to accept things.

Even now, I'm influencing. But rest assured Tiger, 'cause for once this influence comes under the good category.

With love,
Your epiphany hit Chipmunk.

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This chapter is me trying to include drama and failing miserably *bows*

VOTE. COMMENT. SHARE. LOVE.

Misty ✌