impact

zoriah.

I remember first having a conversation with her.
it was different than any other connection from the start. the conversations just flowed. it didnt phase me, it felt natural.
she had the deepest brown eyes i had ever seen. she had a smile that gave me butterflies and it was always impossible to not smile back.
she was passionate. she was quirky and dorky and clumsy and everything i needed at the time. i couldnt have asked for a better best friend. thats what she was. my best friend.
she was from texas. she loved grape sprite, glee, country music, anime and hot cheetos. it was funny because i hated all of those things, but i loved her. i know i loved her, and im not surprised by that. it was hard not to love her. she understood. she didnt think she did, but I promise you that she understood more than i couldve ever imagined.
she was a very strong believer in god. ive never been the religious type, but her being in my life made me thing that there has to be some kind of greater power who loves me enough to bring someone like zoey into my life. who knew that someone i met under such awful circumstances could make me so happy.
i did love her. i do love her. its impossible to refrain from loving someone once you see into who they truly are.
zoey was special. she was so special. she made me see things in a new perspective. big shit. stupid shit, too. she had me wondering if elephants had a favorite color. it might sound stupid to whoever is reading this but that meant the world to me because when she told that damn story i got to hear my favorite sound in the world from my favorite human being.
i loved her laugh. i would try my hardest to make her laugh each time we spoke just to hear it.
ill never understand why things worked out the way they did. they just.. did. it was my fault. it happened and it happened so fast that i didnt even get the chance to thank her for everything she did for me because she did a lot.
i can never view so many things the same.
i fucking hate oovoo.
i cant sleep on the phone with anyone, in any way.
everything was affected when she left my life. music, shows, books, people, concepts, everything.
ill never live the same, but i hope she lives better. i know i loved her. we had never met, but i know that i loved her. i will never forget my time with zoriah.