Hunted

Chapter 26

NOTE: I just thought I'd make it clear that after the spirits make contact with you and work through you, you're never the same as before. You can't hold the sort of power the spirits hold without it damaging you in some way. In most cases (including Azula's case), it makes you go slightly insane. If it's a one off, the effects will be noticable at first before fading until you're almost the same as before. However, if the spirits continually visit you, like they do with Dobry, then you're sort of a permenant whackjob. I'll probably explain this a bit later in the book through Dobry, but I just thought I'd let it be known now.

Chapter 26-Azula's POV

I tried to stop myself from caring. I really did. After all, it was wrong of me to care that my captor was in pain. It was wrong, wrong, wrong.

                But I couldn’t help it. His sadness called to me like a beacon, raising within me an ache that had me fighting the urge to rub my heart. It hurt. Hurt, hurt, hurt. If this was how I felt, I couldn’t imagine how Amias must be feeling.

                Throughout the ceremony, I’d caught the flashes of emotions he tried so hard to hide. I saw them though. I think I was the only one that did. And it broke my heart to see him so...so sad. So alone. So broken.

                It was a feeling I could relate to. He’d lost his only remaining family just as I had lost mine. Only I’d had a choice. Alec had been stolen from him in the worst way possible. Stolen because of me and my stupidity.

                The veil smothering my mind was beginning to lift though, and I couldn’t help but think that it was down to Amias. Whether he realised it or not, he was helping me to fight the haze had been suffocating me for the past few days, ever since the spirit had possessed me and scrambled my mind.

                But with the lifting haze came a rush of emotions that had my heart aching all the more. Pain. Regret. Sadness. Grief. Their force astounded me, consumed me. It made me miss the haze. At least it had shielded me from all this. At least I hadn’t been hurting. I didn’t want to be in pain anymore.

                So like the coward I was, I began to retreat back into the fog, clinging to it like a babe clings to its mother. It was safe in the fog. Numb. I didn’t want to feel. Feeling only led to misery, and I couldn’t handle any more misery. It would break me.

                “No, Azula, you need to fight this!” a voice said inside me. It took me a moment to realise that it was Mahina. She’d been quiet for so long that it was a shock to hear her speaking to me again. The fact that she hadn’t abandoned me warmed me a little. I wasn’t as alone as I thought I’d been. After all, I always had Mahina. We were one and the same, even if we were completely different.

                “But I’m tired of fighting, Hina,” I replied, using the nickname I’d given her when I was younger. I could feel her happiness at the long forgotten word.

                “Azula. Sweet little Zu-Zu. You’re stronger than this.” I heard a whimper and looked around the cave for the source of the noise. When I found no one, I discovered that the noise had come from me.

                “I’m not strong. I’m not, I’m not, I’m not.”

                My legs gave out, as if emphasising my point. I landed on all fours, my hands and knees scraping against the ground and drawing blood. My wounds burned as they healed, but I could hardly feel it. I could hardly feel anything at all.