Staying Together (h.s FanFiction) *editing

Not being accepted

-Alyssa's POV-

I woke up and the spot where Harry slept was empty. Being the lazy person I am, I didn't get up to go look for him. I just laid back down and took my phone out. Looking through my apps I realized I haven't been on twitter lately. I clicked the app and my notifications went crazy. I then realized I was verified, excitement rushed over my body. I clicked my followers and started following some fans, most of them were Directioners but then I saw me and Hailey had a fan account. I smiled at the thought of people actually liking me and Hailey for our music and not just for being involved with One Direction.

I started to look through my mentions and saw a lot of hate.

@StylesBby; ew who is this @Alyssa_Ann chick that is alway with @Harry_Styles she's so fat

@Hazza69; Alright who let the fat cow into Harry's life @Alyssa_Ann

@MacPrincess; I went to school with that creature called @Alyssa_Ann

I couldn't fight the tears anymore, I tossed my phone across the room and crawled into fetal position. My vision was blurred as I remember the worst part of my life.

I still remember it as if it was yesterday.

I sat alone on the bus in 10th grade, all of the 9th grades saying harsh words but I tried my best to ignore them. That's all I could do right? We made it to school and I scurried off of the bus. Walking down the halls was the worst part. The names still rummaging through my mind.

Ew what is that?

Don't touch it, you don't know what kind of diseases it carries.

What a slut wait no that's offensive to sluts for that to be called one

Fat

Ugly

Nobody cares about you

Why doesn't she just kill herself already nobody would miss her?

Once I got home that day I stayed in my room like I did most days but this was the last time. All I kept thinking was why do I keep holding on there's nothing good in life for me. I'll never find someone that loves me for me. All I am is pathetic, a loser, fat, ugly so why don't I just end all of the pain?

I started to barricade my door so no one would find me. I was at my breaking point and I'm not returning this time. The anger inside me started to build. I looked at my long mirror, "Your so ugly Alyssa why are you even here." I punched it once "Your fat." Another punch "Worthless." "Loser." Two punches, my hands started to go numb from the glass. "Nobody will care if you die so just do it already get it over with there's nothing to live for." I took three more punches, glass was all over my floor. I looked at my knuckles there were bruises already starting to form. My knuckles were all cut up and bloody. I still didn't feel satisfied because I was still breathing.

I looked around my room and found a hand pencil sharpener, I used a pencil to take the screw out. Holding the blade in my hand I sat against my bed, my vision became blurry as I looked down at my wrists. Scars ran up and down my arms and now there will be more to the collection. Bringing the blade to my skin I began to cut myself. Not even feeling the pain of it anymore. The world started to get darker and darker soon enough it was pitch black.

I remember my mom telling me in the hospital how she found me just in time. I always hated her for that, why couldn't it be easy for her to let go as it was for me. She went into detail how she found me all bloody and lifeless.

I had to stay in the hospital for a good 3 months after being admitted by my family. They wanted me to get 'better'.

Once I got out I didn't cut at all and now that it about to change.

I got out of bed Harry's shirt went up to mid thigh. I looked in the mirror disgusted of myself. I found one of Harry's razors and I broke it to get the blade out. I slammed the door shut, I leaned back on the door and slid down to my knees. I looked down at my wrists that were filled with scars. Then my eyes focused at my thighs the fresh unmarked skin. Bring the blade to it I applied pressure. Blood started to come out and I felt satisfied with my self. But then I wondered what Harry would think if he ever saw this.

I stood up and quickly cleaned up my mess and hid the evidence, then I jumped in the shower. Rinsing off all of the blood it kind of stung. I was about to get out when I heard the door open. "Hey babe I'm back and I brought Starbucks." Shit.

-Authors Note-

You finally get to see Alyssa's past. What do you think? Much love.xx

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