“I’m not sure if I want to react to that,” he says a bit awkwardly. But, he didn’t end there. In everything Dan does, he manages to put a twist to it. So, he says,” You have the freedom to choose whatever you want except the skin fic. There is no way in hell am I going to chew your burnt skin, neither will I swallow.”
“Gross! Dan! No! I wasn’t even considering that,” I say as I push him further away from me. Not only am I blushing furiously, I’m sweating like a pig as well. That being mentioned, I don’t feel comfortable discussing video ideas.
“That hurt by the way. That reminds me! We aren’t doing BDSM either,” he says before bursting into fits of laughter. After moments of hysteria, he’s now clutching onto his flat stomach and wiping away tears of joy. He’s taking it like a joke, while I sit here in pure horror and disgust. This just epitomizes yin and yang or disturbed and fucked up.
In annoyance I saunter out the room, leaving him on the floor like a retarded seal. In record speed he runs after me. I ignore him of course. As a paid YouTuber, I don’t have time for wasting time. Well, that was redundant and hypocritical. Nonetheless, I’m right.
To my dismay, Dan is still pestering me. From one joke to another, he mutters apologies under his breath to make me notice him. Unfortunately, these are followed by roars of laughter.
What an annoying little twat.
When you’re so close to forgiving him, he finds a way to give you another reason to hate him. It was weirdly endearing at first, but this situation isn’t having a shortage of awkwardness, which means adding those comments won’t make me turn around.
“I was joking! Jeez! You look so much like a tomato! All I need is a juicer and I can finally make some Ketchup,” he says jokingly with his Pomeranian pout . Normally, I would continue to ignore him until my irritation settled, but it’s a struggle when Dan is looking at me that way.
“I know…I’m sorry” I apologize. I then move my head in his direction and give him a sincere smile. As usual, he returned it without a glint of hesitation. But suspiciously, his smile falters and forms into a knowing smile, like he knew something I didn’t.
“What? You haven’t heard me apologize before?” I question as I eye him incredulously. He doesn’t answer, but continues to giggle like an idiot. That set me off again, which he takes to account. I then turn my back at him, and was ready to storm off. But to my surprise, he grabbed me by the arm a bit too strongly. I tried wriggling in hopes to be released from his death hold, but my strength failed me.
“So, do you want to do it, Philly?” he says, startling me. Is he really asking me this? If he’s trying to troll me, I swear to God that he’s going to pray for forgiveness. And what is up with the nickname? Of all the names he could have chosen, he chose “Philly”. It really does shock me that Dan doesn’t take any medication.
“Philly? What am I, a street dog in one of those Indi Films?” I shout at him in anger. I can see that he’s trying to muster in a chuckle, but I couldn’t care less. Dan can suffer all he wants.
“I’m just practicing. I have to internalize, Phil. Acting is SRS BSNS,” he clarifies. It saddens me that Dan isn’t aware of how disturbing he sounds. But for some unknown reason, I’m relieved the whole idea of acting out fanfiction isn’t too “freaky” for him. It’s actually really ironic that I’m the one being so defensive even though Dan’s been shooing shippers away.
“Let me get this straight! You’re fine with acting like a gay couple” I ask as slow as possible to help him fully understands every word I’m saying. By the looks of it, he’s projecting a that-was-an-unnecessary-question face.
