Everyone has those days when they ask, 'why me?' . Not all the time it's necessarily bad, but in my case it kind of is. I have these two guys who love me so much, don't get me wrong I love and appreciate them both. But imagine having to choose between two of your favourite shoes or something. My head is telling me one thing but my heart is clashing with it so much, I'm like a confused little puppy. I breath the biggest breathe I could and looked at the big eyed man laying on that hospital bed, injured because of me, I think it through one more time. Looking behind me where the man that once left me, knowing he was just a door away from me, then back to the man that was there for me when I felt alone. Back to the man that got me pregnant, to the guy that thinks it's his. One last breathe. I get on my knees.
"Yes." I exclaimed. He looked at me as if surprised by my answer.
"Yes?" He questioned with the biggest smile I've ever seen. I nodded holding back the tears. I leaned over to kiss him gently. My lips brushed him, and I felt butterflies. I felt his hand lifting itself to stroke my back.
"Rosa did you want something to- " Dimitri walked in and I instantly jumped off of Adrian. His eyes teared up really fast, his face shocked, confused, surprised, upset and mad all at the same time. He walked out and shut the door extremely hard. I felt the worst guilt I think ever known. I looked at Adrian and he gave me a slight nod letting me go to Dimitri. I ran out into the waiting room looking for him everywhere. Not finding him I ran out Into the car park. I saw him getting into the car, running to him I didn't know what to say.
"Dimitri wait." I yelled. Running till I got to his car window. "Stop, just listen to me."
"No, Rose, you don't have to explain to me about anything." He sounds like he's about to cry.
"Yes I do." I was crying now. Dimitri looked out I to space. "Just listen to me, please?"
"Fine." He whispered.
" Dimitri, he proposed to me." As soon as those words escaped my lips I swear it's like I saw his heart drop. "He was going to propose at the party, but the attack happened. Dimitri I love him too. He's done so much for me."
" Rose, are you hearing yourself right now," his voice more angry than sad now. " You're pregnant with my baby, mine Rose, not his." He's right. " You don't understand how selfish you're being right now. You're only with him, because you feel safe, you know he's desperate for you enough to not hurt you."
" oh my god Dimitri, all relationships are supposed to make you feel safe, not just sometimes when he's there but all the time. They aren't supposed to leave with no explanation, with your enemy on top of that."
"When are you going to get over that, you know I only did that to protect you, our relationship was mixing with our work. Yes I know now that wasn't the way to do it but I've learned from my mistake."
"Our relationship still mixes with our work. Dimitri I can't get over it because it hurt me so much. The one person that I entrusted my heart with, took it with them and just stood on it like it was another part of the pavement. That's worse than being turned to strigoi."
"Look Rose I know I hurt you bad, but I did everything to make up for it. Can I tell you something. I think you're only with him because you feel like he's desperate enough not to hurt you. Not because you love him." With that he just drove.
"I'm always supposed to feel safe with anyone." I screamed as he drove off. I dropped to the ground and cried in the middle of the car park. You know what the worst thing is, he's right. I am with Adrian because he may be my rebound. But he's a rebound that I have strong feelings for.
After about half an hour. I got up and walked back into the hospital. I walked into Adrians room, and he looked at me with a sympathetic look. I went to him, and he grabbed my hand.
"Rose, I know you love him and me both so I'm not forcing you to answer me right now, you can take time." I looked at him. Why can't Dimitri just be like that. I shook my head.
"No, I want you." I gave him a reassuring smile.
"You won't regret this. I promise, I'd never leave you like he did. Or leave anyway. I promise to love you and our baby. Always." He smiled at me. I smiled back and got into the bed w
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