Falling out of Grace

chapter 2

" If am not now! What am I now?" -korn

I've never been the cheerful person. You willl never see me walk around with a smile on my face. I walk this earth with a glare on my face and I carry myself as if am superior than anyone else. even thought i know am not.

I lain myself in bed an looked out that fucking window. I knew Lucy was still looking at me, like im some sort of freak show... to her I was.

Not just how I live my life, who i am in this life, has had her interested in me.

Lucy is one of those rich girls who didn't know what the square root of eight is...let alone two plus two equals four. She was known for multiplying, adding, and dividing body parts... six legs, six arms, three bodies, two dicks, one vagina, equals a threesome, and she was very good at that. A blond bimbo who liked sucking dick just as much as she loved spending her daddy's money. I have to admit, she was nice enough to me, she let me be and she didn't meddle in my business,much.

She loved wearing the latest trends and she was never caught with the same clothes twice, as for me: I repeatedly wore sweat pants and hoodies or skinny jeans and jackets. She had hundred of Jimmy choos and I had about hundreds of Chuck Taylors and Nike. She did her make-up like an expert, I hardly knew how to put on eyeliner.

even thought I hated her at times, she was my bestfriend, and her brother has always been in love with me.

Ethan was another story. He has never cared about their families money, like Lucy has, and honestly I liked how down to earth he can be.

Back in the fifth grade when I met them, My mom and I had moved in to their neighborhood. I wasn't sure at first why, this place had huge houses, that almost looked like mansions... two weeks later I had found out my mom was getting married to some rich guy. He was very nice i can admit, but I wasn't okay with it. I mean moving to a house with a strnger- was a little wierd for me.

I walked around the block till Ethan came and introduced himself. I rember Lucy making fun of me for my babyfat and he apologiezed, then laugh when i punched her in the gut yelling " Don't you wish now, you had some fat in you, anorexic bitch."  later that year she became my friend.

Now I have no Idea why I wanted to be with Ethan, was it because I love him, or because I got used to the idea of him, and the idea that i might be in love with him ( up till this point am not so sure anymore.)

meeting Brody was like an eye opener for me... He was like something never seen of before, but spoken like a God. he was my punch, the spice I needed and have never felt in my short lived life. words can't describe him.

Then comparing Ethan to brody is like child play at its best.

Ethan was an okay fucker.

Brody is a better lover.

The only difference is Ethan is my boyfriend...

Brody is, well not even my friend. if i can put it that way.

I have two classes with him. I couldn't stand him at first. I wanted to punch the saving daylights out of him, then when I saw him in my only class I had on wedsday and he had to be my partner, I wanted to murder my English professor.

I didn't have any classes on thursday and sure enough, neither did he. We worked on a project that night, and he protested he was hungry and that he knew i was hungry, too.

He got me on board to checking out some books from the library, if we couldn't find anything we could Google it. once we got to his apartment, i accepted a shot of Vodka, why not? I had a full stomach and i knew one shot wasn't going to get me tipsy, just a little lose, but after one shot came three, six, then before i knew it... he was on top of me, deep staring  me in my eyes, while he slowly thrust himself in and out of me.

I knew this was wrong.. I maybe drunk, but I knew in the back of my head this was wrong, and only because I have a boyfriend. I didn't care, at the moment. I loved it, I enjoyed every second of it. every kiss every touch, every single shiver that ran through my body, and just before I couldn't think it could of get any better... I had my first orgasm.

As i felt him collapse on me, I couldn't slow down my breathing. I have never felt like this with Ethan, I have never enjoyed sex as I did now.

" I don't want to get up." he moan in my ear " Please stay, with me tonight." and he kissed me on my neck.

" I can't." I said as I was trying to push him away.

" Yes, you can." he said pressing himself on me

" But I won't." and I grabbed his face and kissed him " I have a boyfriend."

" What?" he breathed in my mouth

" I have a boyfriend."

" No. I heard you the first time... what was this then?" he motion

" Fun, this was all in the name of Drunken fun." I said it in a southern accent.

" Boyfriend huh?"

" Yup."

" Does this mean; it will never happen again?" and i saw hope shine in his eyes.

" It means I won't be emotionally attached to you. I can only love you in the pure physical way." i finally pushed him off me.

I tried to get dressed, but he kept on pulling me to him, kissing me, tempting me, but I pushed him away knowing I had to see Ethan.

" You know, I won't think less of you, if you see me and your boyfriend." he whispered in my ear

" Just so you know, I could give a shit, about what you think of me." I let him push me to the wall and raise my arms above my head while he kissed me.

" This will be one fun year."

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I heard my name being repeatedly said over and over, but I ignored it. I knew that it was too late to close my eyes and pretend I was sleeping, beacuse I could see him in my sight.

" We need to talk."

" No, we don't Ethan, can you please leave me alone?" I for once begged.

" I would, but I think we need to straight this out, now." he shouted, this got me angry

" What the fuck do you want me to say? Huh, Ethan? I'm confused. I don't know what t5o say to you."

" This is Fucked up in so many levels. I have never done this type of shit to you.. Not once have I thought of another girl. Now you re-pay my faithfulness by cheating on me with some guy you just met?" he took a deep breath " The school year just began a few weeks ago. THREE FUCKING WEEKS AGO!! and I find you with, with." he motion the bruses and hickeys all over my body "This is not acceptable."

" I know this is shitty, beyond shitty, but I COULN"T HELP IT!!  WHAT THE FUCK ETHAN? what do you want me to say? give me so time." i begged again.

" Time for what?"

" Time for me to think of a way to sugar coat things." i breathed in

" Sugar coat things?" he spit " I'm a fucking man what you need to say now, say it."

" YOU? a man?" I pointed at him an cruelly laughed at him " You really wanna know why I go back to him every single night?"

" Every single night?" he asked confused now, hurt running through his face.

" I think, i have made it more than obvious... You can leave now."

 " Your a fucking whore." he said tears spilling down his face

" Maybe so, but I know for a fact we are through." this last words killed him, i could see it on his face.

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what a bitch.lol

if you have read this far, Merci mon ami.

you don;'t have to comment or fan, just as long as you enjoyed it...