Tbh Idk What To Call This

"I dont want to..."

******Trigger warning******

You woke up to Luke and Bryan talking. "Guys?" You said in a tired voice. They both froze and Luke walked over to you. "We're right here. Its 4 am go back to sleep." He said. You nodded and fell back asleep. Later on you woke up at a reasonable time. Nobody was in the room and your arms felt sore. You saw your razor sitting on the table.

"Why would they leave this out? Its so tempting." You thought. You went over to the razor and picked it up. You examined it and held it tight and started to cry. You saw they cleaned it off and the silver was shinning. You went to put it to your skin when Mikey walked in and screamed no. You dropped the razor and froze in fear and shame. Mikey grabbed you before you fell to the ground.

"You have to flush it." He said. "I don't want to..." You said. "I can't..." "Please for me? And for Luke and Johnnie and Bryan?" Mikey pleaded. You stood up with the razor and walked to the bathroom. "I can't do it." You said crying and holding the razor in a fist on your heart.

"I'll do it." Mikey took the razor out of your hand and held your other hand. "3...2...1." He said dropping it in the toilet. You looked away crying hysterically as he flush the silver and newly crimson razor.

You fell limp and Mikey helped you to sit down. You sat on the bed crying and Mikey hugged you. Johnnie and Bryan walked in and saw. "Y/n?! Are you okay?!" Johnnie yelled running to you. "She flushed her razor." Mikey said rubbing your shoulder. "Oh my god. Y/n, I'm so proud of you!" Bryan said hugging you. "I am too! Do you have any other razors?" Johnnie said giving you a tight hug. "No. I've had the same one for the past year." You said sniffling. "Well, I'm proud of you. It'll be okay you have us." Johnnie said. Luke (korns) walked in and asked what was going on. You explained that the thing you loved so much was now gone. And Luke talked to you privately.

"Y/n, its okay. You don't need it anymore. You have us. All of us no matter what. Let's clean up your cuts on your arms and you can clean the ones on your legs and stomach. Please stay strong. You can always talk to us. You know well listen." Luke said. You started crying and hugged Luke. "Thank you." You said. "No problem. Now let's go clean those and get them checked out." He said handing you a cotton ball with peroxide on it.

"Checked out?" You thought fearfully.