One More Troubled Soul

Six-Trying To Forget Everything That Isn't You

Courtney's P.O.V.

She's dead.

Those two words ran circles in my mind, round and round like a horse on a carousel. I wanted to punch a hole in the wall while, at the same time, curl into a ball in the corner and just cry. But I've shown enough weakness. Anymore, and they may get the idea that I'm not fit to be the leader.

I stared blankly at the black curtain, at the white eighth note canceled out. Our Silence The Noise symbol. I was doing this for her. For Adira. All this destruction of rock and roll, quieting the voices of song. She was running down the path of music, and I didn't want her to be swept into the notes. She wanted to be a rocker, a singer, a musician. And the only way to stop her was to stop the dream itself.

I sighed and pressed my palms into my eyes, trying to compress the headache forming. She had no clue this was happening, that she was the daughter of a cult leader. And it was for the best. Had she known, she would've rebelled. I had enough problems with hunting down bands. Adding in her would've been too much.

So, I kept it quiet. And when she said she had a concert in the place I was sending Fall Out Boy, I couldn't deny her going. It would've raised questions. I gave Jade specific instructions to keep Adira out of it. I said to get the four men, then leave with them, dead or alive. But leave Adira and her band be.

And my request was denied. Anger burned up in me, destruction filling my body to the point of explosion. I yelled out my frustration, my sadness, my fury. I screamed, raged, punched the walls, splintered the chair.

Papers fluttered everywhere when I was finished, falling like confetti after a party. One landed on my head, and I ripped it off to see the smiling face of Patrick Stump. Oh, dear child. You look so much like your father. I could actually feel my heart break in two. His smile was so much like hers. His hair, his eyes. Everything. A perfect replica, besides the fact that he's a guy.

A sob rose up from my chest. I held a hand to my mouth to muffle it, knowing that I wouldn't be able to stop it. As I gazed at the man in the photo, lava began pouring through my veins. "Why the fuck did you survive? Why did she have to die?" I hissed, crushing his pretty little face. If only it were as simple as that, just smash a picture and the real thing dies.

Soft taps on the door startled me, and I quickly wiped away the moisture on my cheeks, straightened up my clothes before calling, or more like growling, "Come in."

The red door eased open nervously, and a mans red face appeared. He took in the devastation I caused, the fear obvious in his eyes and the way he hunched down as he entered. His brown mustache trembled as he spoke, "The band arrived today."

I felt my anger rise again. Damn, this guy is dumb. I wanted to reach out and smack that fucking grin right off his face. Instead, I gripped the edge of my desk so hard I'm sure I broke it, and forced a smile of my own. "I'm well aware of that, Charlie. Thank you, though." I spoke through gritted teeth.

His smile faded and he rubbed at his balding head. "Oh, well...I don't suppose you know what happened to them?"

He was fishing, wanting to give me some sort of information. I now regret hiring the fat bastard. He's only in it for the money, nothing else. I sighed and pressed two fingers to my temples. "Yes, Charlie, I know the situation. I know everything. I was already reported to by Jade."

His face fell. "Oh." He swung his arms aimlessly, and I rolled my eyes, turning away to pick up the scattered papers. I thought my disinterest was enough of a dismissal. But he stepped closer to me, not away to the door, and waved a hand to get my attention. "Excuse me? But, ah, what about the, uh..." he rubbed his fingers together, eyebrows raised and his eyes gleaming hungrily.