The Day I Lost You

1

"Dada?" A small whispered called. I let out a small groan rubbing my face on the soft white pillow. I felt a small weight getting on the bed, then on my back.

"Kegan." I called out which earned a giggle from the little boy. A chuckle escaped my lips as I rolled over causing the child to fall onto the king size bed. I sat up looking down at him then at the other side of the bed, empty.

"Dada?" The little voice called out once more grabbing my attention. "Hungry!" He said again before jumping on the bed.

I caught Kegan as he jumped up smiling. I hopped off of the comfortable mattress then swung him over my shoulders, walking out of the master bedroom "hungry huh? Lets see... We can make mini chocolate chip pancakes, and eggs. Maybe some bacon?"

Kegan cheered out hearing my suggestions with a nod. He still wore his little bear onesies gently patting the top of my head. Kegan. My son. My adopted son to be exact. He's one and half years. Blonde hair. Blue eyes. Cheerful. Giggly.

Unlike myself. Brown hair. Green eyes. Sad. Quiet. I wasn't always sad. I used to be happy back then. Really happy. I had the perfect life. Until there was no longer an us. Now, it's just me. Fighting against this cold world. I just hope I can feel better soon. For Kegan. My friends. Someday I will. I promise.

As we reached the end of the stairs the sound of barking and running engulfed the room. There ran around a small brown and white corgi. He was Kegan's little pup, never sleeps without each other. I laughed setting down my son as the two ran around. Then a loud grunt came out from the hallway. Another dog, a brown coated chow chow. He walked slowly towards me, sticking out his purple tongue. I petting little bear's (yes, I named him bear just because he looks like one) head, then walked into the kitchen.

-

As I finished up putting the dirty dishes in the sink, Kegan jumped off his chair and began running around with the two pups in the backyard. I looked back at the empty kitchen. No hugs from behinds. No running around the island after a soap incident. None of that anymore.

Just the thought of it made my expression change. Knowing that he's better off without me. He isn't coming back. Im never going to see him. All of it. Gone.

I felt my body weaken. My lips quivered. My eyes watery. I slid down to the floor covering my face with my trembling hands. I need him back into my life. Even if Im not really with him. I want to see him be happy and let him now that I care even if losing him was all my fault.

"Calm down Harry. Pull yourself together." I mumbled to myself as I slowly stand back up. "You're okay. You're going to be-"

The doorbell cut me off. The dogs began to bark and ran inside, racing towards the front door. Kegan ran after them happily. A smile appeared on my face when the little boy came to his viewing.

"Neil!" Kegan screamed out. I ran to the front stopping in shock knowing that Kegan can open the door now. "Dada! Look!" He yelled again pointing up at the blonde lad.

"Jesus christ K, you gave me a heart attack" I mumbled picking the small child up, planting a kiss on his head. "I need to teach you to not open the door, that could've been a stranger."

A small laugh came from the third voice. Niall. My best friend. Well, Niall was best friends with... him before we met. Now he's mine. Weird. Niall, pretty badass guy to be exact. He never really had a wild crazy side, rarely though. He was always serious, but then again an absolute goofball at times. Protective too. Especially now since he found out how easily broken I can be. He helped me get better. I owe him so much.

"How are ya?" He spoke once I put the small boy down. I looked up at him then at my arms which had various amounts of colorful bracelets and wrist bands, hiding my painful memory.

"Better." I spoke out, looking back up. I could see the sadness in his eyes. "I-I... Im doing better."

"I'll kill him." He muttered out, seeing his expression harden. I grabbed his face gently when he mentioned 'him'

"He doesn't matter anymore remember? It's just us. You and me. Not him." I whispered quietly. He nodded slowly. I smiled.

I took his hand after a few short moments and led him into the living room. I plopped down on the white couch. Niall on the other side. Our legs tangled. He makes me feel better. So much better. He makes me forget what happened in the past. He always has. I owe him. I love Niall. He loves me back. If only that was my happy ending.

It's actually just the beginning.