Fighting to Feel

Chapter 2- Fighting to Feel

My heart was beating wildly and my palms became slick with sweat. All eyes were on the guardian and I as we weaved through the busy bar once again, not one of them getting in our way. I watched his strong back move with a purpose, too scared to look anyone else in the eye.

As the thumping music and fighting noises lessened I became aware of the slicing chill and dead quiet of the long dark hallway. I quickened my pace to keep closer to Logan as we stopped at a large, sturdy wooden door. No one moved for a moment, both not wanting to go into a place that only sent out wicked vibes that sent goose bumps up my arms. In the corner of my eye I saw him turn to look at me, and in a moment of weakness I allowed myself to look at his face again only this time without my glare.

His expression told me that whatever was behind that door wasn’t going to be pleasant. It held sympathy and a hint of something else. I held his gaze for a moment longer soaking in those hazel eyes before I mentally slapped myself for letting my guard down. I turned my attention back to the door and without another word Logan knocked three times. There was a moment of silence before I heard shuffling, then the door creaked open and I couldn’t help but imagine that I was stepping into a death chamber.  

Logan stepped in while I remained at the entrance. My feet felt like they were strapped with weights.

“Well are you gonna come in or are you just gonna stand there with your mouth hanging open?”

The shrewd voice came down from below. I had to step back and look down to see who was talking. The man before me looked like something out of a movie. His back was hunched over so much he had to crane his neck to look me in the eyes, his nose was very pronounced, and eyes that bulged out with a keen observance.

“S-sorry.” I couldn’t seem to get the right words out of my mouth. My mind couldn’t wrap around the idea of any mystical creatures being real.  

“Great, stupid AND stuttering. Aliah will be very pleased with this one Logan.” The hunched man snickered.

At that snide remark I snapped back to my old sarcastic self. “I’d rather be stuttering than hunched old man.”

He just laughed and shuffled past me to slam the door shut. “Maybe you’re not as dumb as I thought you were.” I kept my mouth shut and glared at him as he shuffled into the darkness. I heard a chuckle and looked up in surprise. Logan was grinning and shaking his head.

“There is nothing funny about this.” I said indignantly. Logan quickly rearranged his grin into a somber expression, his eyes still holding a hint of laughter. “I apologize, but how have you not gotten into trouble for that forked tongue of yours?”

Animosity boiled inside me. I tucked my hair behind my right ear and turned my head left, “I think these pretty scars are more than a little trouble, don't you?” my question dripping with sarcasm.

Whatever laughter was in Logan’s eyes was gone now. He took one step forward and seemed to visibly stop himself from moving any closer. “Yet you still keep that amazing attitude, why?”

“...Because that attitude is all that’s left of me.” I said quietly. Instead of feeling bitter I just felt tired. Tired of always having to put up fronts to hide behind for my lack of beauty, tired of always having to go the extra mile in personality because it’s all any man will ever see in me.

Logan opened his mouth so say something when a musical voice interrupted him.

            “Guardian, would you care to introduce your lovely guest?” Logan’s face tightened and his posture stiffened. “Follow me, and don’t say a word.”