Grayson:
his pov:
I downed another shot and paused as the stinging sensation finally faded. I was drunk now, but not drunk enough to forget about her. I don't think I'd ever be drunk enough to really forget her. I don't know if I love her anymore, but she doesn't love me anymore and I think that's what hurts the most. "Grayson! my man!" I quickly turned to face my extremely drunk brother. "Ethan? how much did you drink?" "Grayson, Grayson, Grayson, tsk-tsk-tsk. don't be such a bitch!" he said slurring his words and dragging out the word 'bitch'. "I'm not being a bitch. but we should get you home." his eyes widened "gotta blast!" he says quickly running away before I could stop him. I knew he'd be fine but I wish he would've stayed because after the conversation was over my thoughts went immediately back to her. I downed another shot quickly as I slammed the small cup back on the counter. I pulled out my phone unlocking it as I pulled up my keypad. my eyes looked from the bottle of vodka to my phone I quickly tilted the bottle back along with my head as I took a huge gulp. I quickly dialed her number and heard the first ring.
this is a stupid fucking idea
second ring
she's probably asleep dip shit it's 2am on a Thursday
third ring yeah fuck this sh-
"hello?" my eyes shot open as I heard her quiet voice speak through the phone. "hello?" she said a little more aggressive than last time. "I-um-hi. I'm sorry for calling so late I j-" "Grayson? what the hell. are you drunk? why are you drunk?" I had all these thoughts running in my head but I couldn't get any words out. "Grayson?" "do you miss me?" I asked abruptly. she stuttered on the other line "hold on wa- wait you can't just ask that" "do you miss me?" "Grayson, yes I miss talking to you b-" "do you love me?" her end was silent as I paced around the small kitchen. "no." she replied quietly. "was it a lie?" "Grayson no. none of the feelings I had for you were a lie. they just aren't there any more." "do you ever think about our last kiss?" she paused "why are you doing this?" "everyone says you're doing fine but I'm not, i get this drunk and I can't even forget about you." "Gra-" "do you ever read my letters?" I asked cutting her off. "I remember when you said you were done. with us I mean. you were crying and there was mascara all over your face. we had so many plans and wishes. I wish I could just forget it ya know?" "Grayson, please stop" "I still have all of our pictures, I look at them sometimes but it makes me feel a lot lonelier than I really am." I paused. "it hurts to know you're happy. which is a shitty thing to think, I know." "why did you call me?" she asked as I could physically hear the tear roll down her cheek as she sniffled. "it's hard to hear your name. and it's hard for me to think you've moved on. my life has been so consumed by this I never even go out, Ethan is probably annoyed by my friends asking where I am all the time. I wish you would just come back, like this was all as dream." I laughed as I heard her faint sniffling. "I'm sorry for calling but I wish I could wake up with amnesia or something because I want to forget, I want to move on. please just tell me it was a dream or something." "I can't do that Grayson. but you need to move on." "I'm working on it." we stayed silent for about 5 minutes. "good bye Grayson." she spoke softly before hanging up. I placed my forehead on the kitchen cabinet. and I realized I'm really not fine at all.
- Thursday, September 17th 5:48 am.
I woke up abruptly this morning and I write this. goodnight. or morning is more suitable probably.
