gasoline | y.min

butterfly

;i need to survive;

- jimin

I look outside the window and what I see is only clouds with different shapes. The house were in silence since the other two hyungs went out to buy foods and I was left alone with my lonely oxygen tank next to me. I miss Yoongi hyung.

The tears came back immediately eventhough I had cried at the airport with my heart out. I just can't live without Yoongi and he left me. Just like what Jungkook did, yoongi is just the same

-

Namjoon and Seokjin hyung said that its good if I attend college near Namjoon's workplace. And that's what making my life so worn out. I had never went to any public school before. I was homeschooled since 12. I was hoping for Yoongi to be here at this time because I feel so intoxicated. I feel so lost and I can't even caught up with my breathing.

"H-hyung! N-namjoon hyung!"

The moment they came inside, my body were limp with the lack of oxygen and my eyes were hooded with a shallow breathing.

"H-help m-me."

-

"I'm a bullet-no-proof"

Namjoon bring me to the hospital today and surprisingly the doctor said my condition are getting better. But I still need to wear that goddamn wires to make sure that I'm still breathing.

"So Jimin, would you want to videocall Yoongi and ask him anything?"

My eyes lit up. And I nods eagerly.

"Of course. I missed Yoongi hyung."

The called took a long time to reach his military batallion but at the end it still works. Yoongi's face look worn out but he looks fine still with that gummy smiled. I reach my fingers towards the screen and touch his face.

"I missed you hyung."

He said the same thing and I cried upon hearing his voice singing me my goodnight lullaby. The videocall ended after the sirent were blaring from Yoongi's place and he quickly kissed the screen and turn off the video call.

I spend my night thinking about Yoongi, wether I will be fine without him for 3 fucking years.

-

"I'm wrapped around your finger"

Morning came painfully slow and Namjoon had feed me with foods but I couldn't eat any of it. He was worried about me but I was worried about Yoongi. Do you know the feeling when someone leaves you, promising that he will comeback and it will be after 3 years? Its hurting me, who knows I will be dead while waiting for him, who knows that I will lost my memory.

Namjoon look pissed so I grab a piece of toast. I wear my favourite sneakers, wear a thick clothing before applying the facemask. It was kinda sad because I have such a low self-esteem since the day Jungkook said such things. But, who cares. I missed Jungkook. I missed his face. I missed everything about him but I can't turn back the time.

Namjoon help me for the registeration and here I am. Standing in front of my first class for today. The oxygen tank cart still safe behind me and I'm alright. I took a deep breath before pushing the door of the auditorium apart. And all of the people inside werw staring at me like I'm the worst person in the world.

Suddenly, the cold return.

-

Strange.

As soon as I woke up, the cold has faded away and my anxiety has comeback to its original position and there is a person sitting next to the bed, sleeping. I try to shifted on the bed and grab for my oxygen wire since this oxygen connector is making me drowning. The wire fell down and the person who is sleeping stirred in his sleep and shot his head up. And I was staring at him with a strange feeling and broken heart.

"J-Jungkook? "

-

He look at me curious.

"I'm not Jungkook you brat."

My brows lifted and I was busy studying his appearance. He did looks like Jungkook. His face, his skin, his hair, his body and his smile.

"Yah you Park Jimin right?"

Silence were the only barrier now but he never cared less. He held out his hand for me to grab it.

"I am Andrew J. Kim. I am half-American and a half-korean student."

B-but he looks like Jungkook.

-

Namjoon catch me up after school and I was having a headache so I would likw to just sleep but the sudden outburst in my head make my eyes snapped open. I look at Namjoon who is driving peacefully.

"Namjoon hyung, can you bring me to Jungkook's? "

He looks at me questionable but I just smile that pity smiled and he smiled back in approval.

"Why suddenly Jimin? "

"I don't know, I kind of missing him."

-

Wind

The wind are rustling softly as I stepped the grass indicating that the weather are fine. Namjoon wants to follow me but I forbid him to. Its because I want to meet Jungkook. Alone.

I remember his grave because Yoongi once try to bring me here, but failed.

The flowers I was holding fell once I see his grave. The tombstone carved his name and I didn't realized I was crying hardly with my hands fisting the grass. Too hard too control.

"I know you will came today."

I can feel the rough hand against my shoulder and that soft voice.

Andrew Kim.

A/N : Its a filler uwee end of updates for today. Oh and does the new cover okay? Idk I just kinda feel it looks like a trash. And sorry for that sudden Andrew tho, idk any other good names to put xD