I'm Always Here

Chapter 1 ~the reveal~

I didnt know what to think at that moment. All he did was stare at me with those light brown eyes that reminded me of the forest, I could set sail and get lost in his eyes. I looked back at him trying to look away but i was so glued into them. I could feel my face start to heat up and brighten.  I finally was able to work my eyes down examining his features. His skin was flawless not a single bump or pimple, looked smooth. His little button nose, then tight thin lips that curled up in a side smile. He was beautiful. My eyes trailed back up to his eyes. I was glued once again. My mind was blank and my heart raced like a race horse.

In our stare his hair had fell out of place from his hat and into his face covering up the top half of his eyes. Allowing the trance to be broken. But yet i still stared. He swung his head to the side and back causing his shinning black hair to swing back and into place. It was messy but controlled. It had little to no nots and was perfectly cut. He placed the hat back down on his head then went on talking to his girlfriend. honey lemon, as he calls her. She was beautiful too, i guess. Super tall, long blond hair. Cute little pink glasses. She was beautiful and half the guys in our college drooled over her.

I admit they make a cute couple but i think he would look better with someone else. I always found myself jealous when it came to him. He's always going out and having fun with so many people that are not me. I wish for once he would stay home with me.

I heard a grumble come from behind me causing me to break my gaze from my brother and got to the noise behind me. It was the professor. I let out a deep sigh knowing what he was grumbling about, looking back down at my paper. Im not in the mood to take this stupid test, im smarter than this. My brains also to busy thinking about my brother, tadashi, to do anything at all. Its driving me crazy.

I growled in frustration and ran my fingers through my hair leaning back in my chair, slouching.tilting my head all the way back. I could see the light from the ceiling shine down on the outside of my eye lids. Then a silhouette appeared upon them.

"Are you okay hiro?" I hear an all to familiar voice say. I quickly shot my eyes open flinching a little from the sudden light contact and leaning forward. Looking back down at my paper.

"Y..yeah im fine!" I say stuttering like a idiot.

God im a moron. I cant even talk straight. Let alone think straight. Especially when im feeling gay for my brother.

I felt my brothers hand slide up my back and onto my shoulder, lightly squeezing as almost a reassuring statement to say he's there.

" hey, how about after this we go get some ice cream?" I heard tadashi ask as his question slide from his mouth and into my ear.

I stiffened slightly and blushed deeply. I kept my head down hiding it the best i could. Now i just need to answer without a stutter....

"That would be.."

Almost there, no stutter! I was practically screaming at myself as i spoke.

"Amazing i...i cant w..wait"

I finished up and mentally slapped myself...fuck...i stuttered.

"Alright, meet me in my workshop after your done with your test" tadashi said giving me his cute side smile. Walking away and out of the classroom.

I rushed all to quickly on my test. Scanning the question and picking random answers that i know will end up being correct. Standing then sliding my light blue jacket on, i hurried up to the front bringing the professor my test. Before he could speak i was already out the door.

I was extremely excited about this. Maybe while we are out i can some how manage to wiggle my feeling to him in a conversation and finally admit it. Even see if i can smooth talk my way into seeing if he feels the same.

I turned the corner, hoping on one foot about to fall but regaining my stance and went straight for tadashi's workshop door. Stopping right in front of it my hand on the handle. I could see his silhouette through his glassed walls. Twisting the knob i then see another silhouette appear. It walked up to tadashi and leaned in. I knew it must have been honey lemon by how tall the black figure was. I saw they were about to kiss, i panicked slightly and swung open the door causing it to smash into the wall and a loud echo went about the room.

"Tadashi!" I screamed, which was not my attention.

"Hiro?" He asked with a questioned tone.

"I...uhh...stubbed my toe" i said with a innocent look and smile, tilting my head slightly like a puppy.

He chuckled.

"Then why did you say my name?"

"Are you just going to keep asking questions or Are we going for ice cream?" I said trying to bypass the questions.

I then realized that it was honey lemon that was in there when i see her trying to seem like shes there. She just scanned the room. Picking small things up then placing them down.

I then find myself getting extremely upset for some reason.

"I...never mind, see you at home" before he could answer i ran out of the room and towards home. I could feel hot salty liquid start to fall down my face.

Why was i crying? There was no reason too. Was it because i was jealous? That is a good possibility. But i dont want to admit that. I dont want to admit anything. Especially when it came to tadashi. I change my mind. I dont want him to know. I dont want any one to know. I ran faster.

I finally reach the café, running in then upstairs completely ignoring aunt cass saying my name. I slam my door shut behind me and fall face first on Tadashi's bed. The tears were now pouring and i clenched the sheets like my life depended on it.

"Why cant you love me tadashi!! Why cant you hug me like you do honey lemon!! Why cant you kiss me like you do honey lemon!! I love you tadashi!! I love you so much more than anyone else every could!!! I scream as the tears drip off my face and on to the pillow. Causing a darker shade of the blue pillow case to appear.

I dont know why im yelling. Its not like he can hear me and im glad he cant. I just need my feelings to be heard, even if no one is listening.

"Hiro?" I hear my brothers voice from behind me. It echoes through out my ears as my heart pounds and my tears instantly stop. I stay staring down at the pillow with a straight face. Hoping and praying he didn't hear what i was shouting. "Do you really feel that way ?" I then hear him say suddenly right after breaking the silence.

Fuck....

~ that was my first chapter please help me with commenting what you thought i could maybe improve on or voting if you like it. Thanks ;3~