Story Of My Life (A Nikita and Fast&Furious Story)

Chapter 12

I threw another punch to the bag letting out all my anger. I have been working out for hours. I throw another punch harder than before making my hand twist.

"Ahh fuck " yelled I in pain holding my hand.

"Easy there " said Joe coming to me and looking at my hand.

"It just a twist. Come with me" said he afrer examinated it.

"I can hanlde a twisted hand Joe. I've been through so much worse" said i turning around facing the punching bag. I throw another punch, harder than before.

"Ahh" screamed again in holding my hand. Oh cmon!

"Why are you doing this to yourself ? Why are you hurting yourself?" Said he grabing my arm and spining me around, facing him. I kept my head low looking at my hand not being able to look him in the eyes.

"Im fine Joe just leave me alone" said i half whispering.

"No you're not." Said he touching my chin and making me face him.
"No one wants to be alone. I know you've been dealing with a lot of shit in your life. But i also know that you are stronger than that." Said he looking me straight in the eyes.

I felt tears forming in my eyes but i refused to let them out.

"Yeah i've been through a lot. But im here now Joe. Im breathing, im alive, im safe. My parents arent. I left behind me thousnds of girls, who are leaving hell every single minute." Said i raising my voice in every word. Soon i was yelling in his face.

"Jade.." Said Joe but i interupted him.

"I could've safe them. I should've saved them. " yelled i again. Tears were coming out of me . Angry tears .

"Its not your fault. You cant save everybody. You're just hurting yourself" said Joe a calm tone.

"You feel guilty and you have no right to feel that way." Said he touching my checks. " you cant safe everybody" repetes he half whispering resting his forehead on my forehead and his hands touching my checks. My lips were trembeling and i tears were rushing down my face like water falls . I let it all out my walls letting bricks falling down. And in that moment the unexpecting thing happened.
His lips connected to mine in a matter of second. Our lips were moving in synch and it felt good.  When people in movies talk about fireworks and other things. Damn thats right! I felt great but than , again, i dont deserve this. I dont deserve to be happy. Not if everyone else is hurt. I pulled away breathless.
Our eyes connected again. Puzzeled expression was written all over his face.

"Im sorry. I cant" said i running away. I start running ignoring the pain in my hand since the pain in my heart was bigger. I runned out of the house in the streets. I looked like a mess but i couldnt care less.
I stopped for a moment taking deep breathes till my breathing was back to normal.
I sat down on a bench and looked at the view in front of me.

"Why are you crying?" Asked a little boy who seated next to me. I looked at him and than turned back at the view.

"Its complicated ." Said i smiling at him

"Im a big boy. I can understand" said he

I let out a small smile answering.

"Well i feel guilty, because i wanted to help someone but i couldnt " said i smiling looking at him. He looked at me and than nodded

"Did you want to help them?" Asked he again trying to figure it out.

"Yeah " said i

He waited for a moment than said