“So I’ll see you tomorrow?” she’s leaning back in the lift, her hair falling down the stainless steel walls, scribbled with graffiti and stinking of weed smoke. Somewhere far below us the lift mechanism groans, the horrible screech of metal on metal as I press the glowing red ‘up’ button.
“School? You’re coming to school?” I wrinkle up my nose. She laughs. Nervously. She clenches her hands into fists, only to slowly uncurl them again. I wonder what’s bothering her.
“Don’t look so surprised. I do sometimes go to school you know. Anyway, we’ve got double English-” she crosses her arms across her chest. And I groan, closing my eyes. Plunging myself into my own private darkness.
“I hate English, it’s such bullshit Cheryl-”
“We’re reading Wuthering Heights. I’ve wanted to read it since forever but I bet I’m really behind now, right?”
“I dunno, not much has happened-” my eyes fly open as she elbows me in the ribs.
“We were just getting to the exciting bit-” the lift grinds to a halt. The doors begin to slide noisily open.
“Exciting? Is any of it exciting?” I laugh as together we step out onto the damp concrete. The puddles from the rain earlier are quickly freezing, making our trainers skid about. Cheryl tries to turn around, but she nearly falls, and she grabs on to my arm, laughing.
“Sorry-” she springs away from me as though my skin burnt her. I just smile and watch her as she pirouettes carefully on the ice. She doesn’t wobble this time, but landing perfectly poised, her knees bent, her back straight. And then she laughs. Her face cracking into a smile.
“Come on-” I smile right back at her, holding out my hand to her. She takes it. Twisting her hand around my fingers. And now she’s wrapping my arm around her shoulders, and I can feel her hair tickling at my skin as she pulls me closer.
“You’re me best friend.” She murmurs. Her eyes flicker downwards over my body. Taking in every inch of me. I feel as though my chest is slowly being filled with heavenly light candyfloss. Or like a piñata stuffed with glitter.
“I’ll call you tomorrow morning, yeah?” she asks, resting her head on my shoulder as together we walk down the narrow walkway. The lights away over the city gleam on the river, gold and red and white, streaming out over the inky black water. I can smell a hint of fire in the thick night air. She blinks slowly, her eyes fixed on me, not the shadowy city spread out over the hillside.
“Okay” I breathe. Suddenly we’re outside my front door. I don’t want to look at her. “Are you sure you don’t want to come in?” I ask quietly. She frowns, tiny wrinkles running along her forehead.
“I can’t babe. But I’ll call for you tomorrow before school.” She smiles.
“I wish you’d leave him” I whisper as she takes a step closer to me. I raise a hand, and suddenly realise it’s shaking. I bite my lip, looking at my own hand in surprise. And then I touch her face gently. She shakes her head a fraction, looking at me sadly.
“No, not now-” she whispers. And I can’t say anything, because suddenly my words are choked in my throat, and I can hardly even breathe. I just open my mouth helplessly, looking at her. As though I won’t ever be able to look enough. And then she drops a single, soft kiss on my lips. Filling my heart with sherbet. Dissolving away. Hot. Her hands gently touch my neck, her fingertips shaking. Her eyes fly over my face. I let myself drown in their inky depths. And then she turns away. One, two, three steps into the choking darkness. The sound of her key in the door. The creaking hinges. Leaving me trembling for more.
