This is so wrong

Chapter One - Bees

This is wrong. This is so wrong. Enemies aren't supposed to be on the floor in an embrace. I am not supposed to be hugging Accelerator. I am not supposed be hugging this guy. What am I talking about? I'm not supposed to be in this kind of contact with a guy at all! I am 99% sure I am a heterosexual! No, not even 99%, I'm... 102% sure, but here I am, hugging my male enemy with romantic tension practically seeping from the walls...

Oh... I, uh, probably should explain and introduce myself. My name is Kamijou Touma. I'm a Level 0 at [name] Academy. I'm not really sure what my Esper is, but apparently it cancels out all supernatural, magical, and divine intervenes, and this includes Lady Luck's blessing, according to Index. Now, my little situation all started about... 2 days ago, not counting today. I was getting ready to make my way to school, frantically rushing around to gather my things, when I heard Index talking to someone. I walked into the living room to see Claire sitting on the couch.

"Hey.", Claire greeted, her legs crossed. Next to her was a large bouquet of flowers, and a box of chocolates. I looked at her with suspicion.

"What's with the flowers and chocolates?", I asked. She looked down.

"Um... well... there's been something I've been meaning to tell you...", she said, stood, and carried the bouquet to me. She then got on one knee, and looked up at me. What is she doing-!?

"Will you marry me?", she asked. My eyes widened.

"WHAT--", I was interrupted by her.

"Is what I would've said if they were from me.", Claire said, smiling. I sighed a breath of relief.

"Wait... if they aren't from you, then where did you find them?", I asked. She got up, her knees popping loudly. She muttered a quick "ouch".

"Um... iunno! I found them in front of your door.", Claire explained, and looked at the chocolate box. I took the flowers from her, and looked at the tag.

"Please enjoy the flowers and chocolates. The chocolates represent how sweet you are, and the flowers represent your beauty, my love.", I read aloud. Claire gagged.

"That's so cheesy.", she said, "Does it say who it's from?". I shook my head.

"You can have the chocolates. I don't like those fancy ones.", I said, and sniffed the flowers.

"Touma. Do. Not. Move.", she said. I looked at her, and tilted my head, when suddenly, I felt a sharp pain on my arm. There were bees inside the bouquet!!

"Ow!!", I exclaimed, flinching.

"Touma stop!!", Claire exclaimed, grabbed a book, and began hitting me.

"Ow!! Ow!! Ouch!! Stop it!! Fukou daaaa!!", I screamed as I kept getting beat, and stung.