Family Of Horror (Sequel to Ghost Rider)

23;

Ricky's POV:
Please tell me I'm going insane. I can't like Jaide like that. I love Devin. After I call the guys I walk back to Jaide's room. She was sleeping peacefully, her face slack, making her appear even more beautiful. I really should just stay away from her. It would never work.

Her eyes flutter open and she smiles at me. "Why'd you come back?" She asks while I move her hair out of her face, sitting beside her on the bed. "Wanted to make sure you were ok." We had planned for her to leave immediately after the baby was born so she wouldn't have to see him but I had this feeling in my chest that made it hard to let her go. "I'm fine thanks. I know you and Dev will raise him right." She smiles, trying to conceal the elephant in the room.

"About that kiss..." I say quietly and she looks down as if she did something wrong. "I liked it, but I love Devin and with the kids..." I make up excuses. "Don't worry about it. I get it. Go be the great father I know you are." She smiles, a sad look in her eyes. "I don't want to say goodbye." I whisper under my breath. "You'll always have my number. We can hang out sometime if you want." She sits up. "Ok. Just for now, goodbye." I kiss her lips, before I could talk myself out of doing it, savoring the feeling of her lips.

I walk out, not looking back as I go to find my husband. I was anxiously playing with my lip piercings, wondering if he'd ever find out. I love him I really do, but I love Jaide too. What am I doing with my life?

I find him staring into the window of the NICU where they were keeping Portland since his mother didn't want him in the room with her. It would be too hard to give him up.

"That him?" I ask since I've never seen him before. "Yeah." He nods, watching the baby sleep. "We should be able to leave in less than an hour." I mention, scratching my back. "Are you okay? You've been acting strange." He finally asks after an awkward pause. "Yeah, just tired I guess." I shrug, he just looks at me. I feel so guilty but I can't bring myself to tell him.

"I'm going to find Balz and Ryan, I'm sure they're lost somewhere." He grumbles, not happy that I was obviously not telling him something. I let him leave, not saying a word, just staring at Portland. He was a cute baby, looked lot like his mother which helped me not go insane.

"You want to see him? Up close?" A nurse asks suddenly, making me jump. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." She chuckles at me. "It's ok, and can I?" She nods leading me in, taking him out of his crib, and putting his little body in my arms.

His eyes open slowly showing his vibrant green eyes. Now that isn't from Jaide, no, Jaide had deep brown eyes that made you feel warm inside. "Hi little buddy." I whisper, looking at him, trying not to think of Jaide.

"Your other daddy and I are excited to have you, your older sis is probably even more. Her name is Heresy. I'm sure you'll get along. She's four years older than you and as a kind heart." I tell him, just talking. "I'm sure your going to grow up wanting to meet your mother but until she decides she's ok with that, you're going to be angry with her, but trust me, she's just young and scared. She'd keep you if she could."

I imagine her aweing over her newborn son and how happy she'd be if she had her crap together. She deserves to be happy, and in a way taking Portland is helping but in way it's not. It's human nature for a mother to want to raise her young, but she can't, 17 and all alone.