Sorry I'm Not Her

Chapter One

"Partying is such sweet sorrow." - Robert Bryne

Ever since that accident, life has been a living hell. My parents seem to be arguing more and more every day. And the people around me try to avoid me. Usually people would say shit about you or beat you, but I'm below that. I'm no longer given the privilege of such act. I'm just a lonely soul strolling through the halls.

I could still remember when all of this shit happened. It was a peaceful night on a full moon. Juliana and I were going to a party. I pleaded her to come until it became more forced. We were dressed up as typical sluts ready to party. Our skirts were high like our heels. Our faces were encrusted with heavy makeup. The only difference was our hair. Mine was curled to form waves, whereas, hers was braided like it usually was.

Past: February 28, 2015

We snuck out and I drove us to the party. Dallas Logan opened the door and invited us in. He was drenched with the smell of alcohol, but I still found him attractive. He placed both of his arms around our waists and guided us to where all the action was beginning. I saw him whisper into Juliana's ear, but I couldn't hear anything because of the loud banging music in the background. From the look on her face, I could tell she was disturbed, but I quickly dismissed the thought. Logan guided us through the crowd towards the dance floor. People were sucking on each other's face while some were getting it on. I smirked at them and followed Logan. He grabbed a couple of drinks off the counter. I knew they were spiked, but I still drank them. Juliana, however, wasn't much of a drinker so she set hers down. I snatched her cup and finished it. I could tell Logan was turned on. We started dancing for a moment before it became more than such.

He pulled us towards a room. My throat, however, was dry so I excused myself for a bit to grab a drink. He chuckled and allowed me to. I saw him drag her into the room and close the door before I went to get a drink. A couple of guys were on the counter chugging down bottles of whiskey. I watched them drink and the next thing I knew, I was joining them. I was slowly gulping down liters and liters of alcohol. A familiar yelp made me channel back to my senses. I knew who the cry belonged to.

I stumbled off the counter and excused myself. I staggered back towards the room I had left. My head was pounding like crazy. I shove the door open to find Juliana on the floor crying with her makeup dripping down her face. Her clothes were slightly torn and I could tell she was hurt. Logan was lying on the floor next to her. His eyes were closed. No doubt he had passed out, but my attention wasn't towards him. I ran towards Juliana to comfort us. I tried to soothe her as she cried into my shoulder. I told her that everything would be okay and that we would go home now.

We both slung our arm around each other as we pushed through the crowd towards my car. She told me I was drunk and that I shouldn't drive. But I was ignorant and didn't allow her to. She reluctantly stepped into the passenger seat as I started the engine. Before I knew it, I was speeding down the highway. The meter started increasing from 50 mph to 70 mph to 90 mph. I couldn't stop myself.

I remembered Juliana telling me to slow down, but I couldn't. My head was pounding and I couldn't decipher the acceleration pedal from the brakes. I couldn't slow down. I turned to look at Juliana's face. She was panicking, I could tell. She has been a good girl all her life. Her braids were still nicely formed. She didn't deserve to die from my acts, but I couldn't do anything about it. Tears were streaming down her eyes as I looked at her. My heart was racing, but not one single tear escaped. I knew we were going to crash any time now. And before the car flipped over, I said the one word I've never said in my whole entire pitiful life before taking away 4 lives.

"Sorry."