Freedom -- A Rocky Lynch Story

Chapter 5

There's a specific feeling one gets in the pit of their stomach when they feel danger lurking. It is an uneasy, queasy feeling that protects us, letting us know that something is wrong. Riley was no stranger to the ill, stomach churning feeling she felt when she thought about going home. The fight or flight response kicked in and weighed the options. Should she go home and face whatever was waiting for her -- fight? Should she avoid it like the plague and seek little distractions -- flight?

She made every excuse she could think of to her mother over the phone. Rocky was moving soon so she'd see a lot less of him. It was her birthday weekend, so didn't she deserve to have a little bit of fun? It wasn't like she had homework to do; she had decided to postpone college for a couple of years. She was in no state to deal with that stress.

All throughout the conversation, Riley was gauging Emily's mood. She didn't sound mad. Did she know what her oldest daughter did? She sounded tired. That was typical. There was nothing out of place in their conversation, which made Riley question whether or not her step father had even told his wife about the previous night. How had he explained away the inevitable purple and blue bruising that painted his jaw, or the swelling?

But when she started to think about the pain that she caused Chris, she started to feel less anxious. Rocky was right when he said that her stepfather deserved it. If he hadn't told her mother about the altercation, it must mean that Riley had a little bit of power. Power was leverage. Power could mean freedom.

Mama and Papa Lynch welcomed Riley with open arms that weekend. They had family dinners, played board games, and even went bowling. It was the most fun that Riley had ever had, and she had nearly forgotten about everything that had been weighing her down. Even Rocky noticed that she was laughing again. He wondered if she knew what real joy felt like before this. And every night, Mama would make the couch into a paradise, covering it with a soft down comforter and as many pillows as she could find. Those nights, she slept without fear in her mind. Riley could get used to this. Maybe this was freedom.

But then Monday came.

Monday came and she had completely forgotten about how her best friend was moving. She tried to remind herself that she would be okay. He's only a phone call away. He's only 10 minutes away by car. How long would it take to walk there? Maybe 45 minutes if she took her time? This could world. This would work. This had to work. There was no other option.

"Hey, Riles," Rocky called to her as he and his brothers lifted boxes into the pull-behind trailer that was hitched to the back of his car. She looked over to him, sipping from the mug of warm vanilla coffee that she held in her hand. She didn't have to verbally respond; a look was all Rocky needed. "Can you grab that last box by you" He nodded to a box in the doorway labeled with his name.

Riley sighed and set her mug down on the table that was just inside their door. She knelt down to the box and nestled one hand underneath it, wrapping the other arm around the outside of the cardboard. Without knowing how heavy it was going to be, she used all of her strength to hoist the box off of the ground. It was surprisingly light. Either that or she was stronger than she knew. With a couple of large strides, she made her way over to Rocky and handed him the last box. "Here ya go, lazy," she laughed.

"You were right there!" he defended. "It would have been more work for me to get out of the trailer, walk all the way over there, pick the box up, walk all the way back, get back into the trailer, and place the box in here correctly." Riley rolled her eyes and mocked him. "You had to do half of the work! And it's about time. You've just been watching and sipping your coffee."

"You never asked," she shrugged. Rocky jumped out of the trailer and pulled the door shut, locking it at the bottom to secure his belongings. When he was done, he stood to face Riley with his hands on his hips. Their eyes locked and they sighed in unison. "So..." she bravely broke the silence. That one word hung heavily in the empty space between them, and they could both feel it pulling at them. "This is it?"

"You're so dramatic," Rocky tried to joke, to bring down the tension. "It's only--"

"10 minutes, I know," she finished his sentence. She was so tired of that phrase. She had repeated it in her mind over and over again, and it was starting to become less comforting. Maybe they could come up with another way to say it. It's only one sixth of an hour away. It's only 600 seconds away. That didn't help.

He let out a quick chuckle before pulling her into a tight hug. It felt like home when they were wrapped in each other's arms. They've shared countless hugs over the years, but this time it was different. He wasn't hugging her to protect her. She wasn't hugging him out of fear. There was something else between them, but they couldn't put their finger on it exactly. They couldn't pinpoint it, so they left it alone.

"Let's get going!" Riker called to Rocky, who was still squeezing Riley like there was no tomorrow. When Rocky pulled away, both of them could feel the emptiness. They knew something was missing, and dismissed it as the sorrow they felt to be away from each other. It was something else though, yet they still couldn't pinpoint it. So they left it alone.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he promised her before he got into his car. Before they drove away, he pressed his wrist to the window to show her his bracelet -- the one that matched the one around her own wrist. Her fingers ran over the silver ring as she heard his words echo in her mind. You are whole.