my life story

The urge and disappointment

this may be a little bit of a trigger warning. So I'm just warning you.

today had been the worst day ever. At first I was happy and all that, then my boyfriend breaks up with me over text without even giving me a reason. So automatically think there's something wrong with me. Then things got a little better when I got to math. Ew math I know, but his friend was really comforting and saying he was just being a big dick and douche bag. Then everything was okay for a while until I got home, where things just got worst.

my grades haven't been the best so my mom talked to me about them. Then she told me she was disappointed in me. Which made me really sad, that I actually started crying. That's really serious when your own mom said that to you. So I just walked away and locked myself in my room for the rest of the night. Now I'm sitting here trying to not go back to my old habits. I'm really trying not to cut I've been clean for a month now. I know that if I cut my mom will be even more disappointed me. And I don't really want that.

I'm sorry that it was alot sadder than my normal posts but I just had to let my feelings out instead of keeping them inside where it'll tear me apart from the inside out.