The Asshole Of His Dreams (manxman|| #lgbt)

Chapter Seven

Johnathan

Mmh... My pillow smells soo good. And so warm. I snuggled closer. Wait. Why was my pillow snoring. Nah... Can't be.

But there it was. A quiet snore as the thing moved. I screamed. My pillow was alive. I groped for the covers as a loud thump sounded followed by a scratchy "the fuck?"
Oh god! Who'd I bring home with me. I crawled to the side of the bed and peeked from under the covers. Carter was rubbing at his eyes with a little frown.

"Why were you in my bed. Again?" I whispered.

"Um.. I fell asleep?" he asked. Dumb ass.

Oh my god! "Why are you naked? Oh my god! Did we? We did didn't we? Oh god!" I groaned holding my throbbing head. I had sex with Carter. Evil monkey butt Carter.

"We didn't! You fell asleep in the bathroom before we could! And you're still fully clothed." Carter says pulling on his underwear. Immediately I ripped the covers off and indeed I was fully clothed. I sighed in relief.

"I fell asleep in the bathroom? Was I taking a shit or something?" Carter puts his hands on his hips as he laughed.

"Nah.. You went to piss and you were in there for like five minutes. When I went to check on you, you were asleep on your feet with your junk hanging out. I zipped you up and brought you to bed. I fell asleep too." Carter summed up.

Right. Lisa and I went clubbing and Carter and I dry humped each other on the dance floor before we came to my house. Jeez! I was actually gonna fuck Carter last night.

"That doesn't explain why you're naked." I furrowed my brow at him.

"Your house is really hot at night. Must've lost my clothes sometime trying to keep cool." Carter says going into the bathroom. I was too scared to get out of bed. I almost fucked Carter last night!

"I'm making breakfast." the monkey says traipsing out of my bedroom like he owned the place.

A good ten minutes passes before I absolutely needed to get out of bed and use the toilet. My bladder was screaming at me. I took a shower and pulled on some basket ball shorts and a tank top. The diner was closed today as we had some lighting renovations being done.

I stepped into the kitchen just as Carter turned off the stove. "Oh hey! I'm done so you can eat while I grab a shower. When I'm done I'll eat and I need a nap before I go home." I was at a loss for words. The man acted as if we were married or some shit like that.

I ate slowly trying to sort through my memories of last night. Oh god! I practically fucked Carter on the dance floor. I needed to get out of here. But Carter's here. Shit.. Oh! He said he wanted to nap. Bingo! I took a note pad from the draw and scribbled a note and placed it next to his plate of food. It read:

Dearest motherfucker,

I left to go check on the diner. Do not burn my fucking house down or break anything. If you so much as disrespect my house I'll murder you in your bathroom. Stuff your body down the garbage shute and not lose any sleep over it.

Peace out,
Biotch!

Ps. Bitch, Lock up my house and drop the keys at the diner, they're on my dresser.

I smiled and walked out the door whistling a random tune. When I arrived at the diner Lisa was already here and she looks thoroughly fucked.

What's that on your neck?" she jumps a bit and smacks my arm. I quirked a brow at her.

"Um.. A mosquito bite?" she answered nervously.

"Say, that's one big ass mosquito." I wiggled my brows at her. She giggled then abruptly stopped.

"Oh you slut! You fucked Carter!" I covered my ears and shook my head no.

"What!? You guys looked as if you'd do it in the car! How come you didn't... Cum?" she giggled at her own genius.

"Details for details. You go first." I smirked when she blushed.

"Okay, okay, well after you left with your man candy I stayed until Jim's shift ended. I told him I was going home with a guy from the club. He goes all he man telling me that I would be going home alone." she was so outrageous flinging her hand all about the place.

"So I said 'Jim I am going to get me some dick cuz my pussy has been in withdrawal since seeing your sexy ass and since you wanna play stingy with your dick I'll definitely get it from someone else' honest to god I nearly had a heart attack when I realized I let it slip that I liked him." Lisa giggled.

"Then he said 'dang darling you haven't been laid in a year. Well you ain't fucking nobody tonight. Except me' I swear I actually swooned! Then we came back to his place and fucked all night. And get this." she leans close as if giving away government secrets.

"When he dropped me home this morning he gave me a toe curling, orgasm inducing kiss and he said 'you're mine and mine alone" Lisa giggled, "Your turn."

I froze. Eh? Nothing happened but I still can have some fun.

"He fell asleep in the bathroom." I screamed at the voice behind me.

A/N

Hehe... I dunno. I just had fun writing this.