What you Do to ME

Chapter 1: Brave (chapter song: Brave Sara Bareilles<3)

Cameron didn't know what to do. This wasn't supposed to happen. He wasn't supposed to be that guy. He didn't know why when he looked at girls he didn't get as excited as he should. But it all started when he came into the picture. The guy that made Cameron feel weird. He didn't know what that feeling meant when he saw the boy. It was like he was on a rollercoaster that was rigged to go upside down, right-side up and backwards all at the same time and he wanted it to stop, but at the same time he didn't. Those piercing blue eyes shouldn't make him freak out. But they did. Cameron sighs tugging on his quiff and pulling on a faux smile. This was only supposed to be about making vines... He walked out of the bathroom to see the brunette lying across the hotel bed with Shawn strumming on his guitar behind him and Jack and lying beside Nash.

Cameron felt an uneasy feeling in his stomach as he took his spot on his own bed and began scrolling through Twitter. "Oh hey man, look what Brent just posted, it's hilarious" Nash calls out to Cameron.

Cameron feels butterflies in his stomach but ignores them, flipping over on his side facing the wall.

"Hey Cam are you okay? That Mexican food did taste a little old..." Nash says.

Fuck why did he have to be so perfect... so caring... if he were an ass this would be easier Cameron thought to himself.

"Uh no I'm good just got a bit of a headache that's all" Cameron says flipping over to face the blue-eyed boy. "Ya sure bro?" Nash asks raising a brow at him. "Yeah dude I'm good" Cameron says turning his attention back to his phone. Nash shrugs going up behind Shawn, who is recording a video for his fans.

"Hey guys its Shawn! Um I'm here at a hotel with my man Nash and we are going to be having shows all around the US so make sure you get your tickets! The link is posted below and make sure you subsr-"Nash cuts him off, "Don't subscribe to him subscribe to me!" Shawn laughs putting Nash in a headlock. "Yeah make sure you subscribe to this bum as well, Thanks so much guy's bye!!!" he says cutting off the video. Cameron groans throwing his phone aside. Maybe if I leave and get something to eat I will have a clearer head... Nash always says I don't think straight when I'm hungry... NO!! Don't think about Nash... Cameron thinks to himself as he walks out of the room. He plugs in his headphones before anyone can ask where he is going and puts his music on shuffle. He hears a familiar beat and nods his head to it as he pushes the button for the elevator.

You can be amazing you can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug

That's how Cameron felt when he made vines for all of his fans and when he received the positive feedback from them. It's what he loved so much about his job. Being able to make people smile. And having his best friend do it with him was even better.

You can be the outcast or the backlash of somebodies lack of love

Or you can start speaking up

Nothins gonna hurt you the way that words do

When they settle beneath your skin

Kept on the inside no sunlight sometimes the shadow wins

That's how Cameron felt when he received not-so-nice feedback and hate messages, he wasn't funny, he was ugly, and he didn't deserve anything. And it hurt so much sometimes especially when this is what he loved to do best. But then he had Nash and everything seemed to get better. Like nothing mattered but them.

I wonder what would happen if you say what you wanna say and let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I wanna see you be brave

Cameron let out a sigh as he got out of the elevator. That part of the song really hit close to home. He wishes he was brave. Brave enough to stand up to the people who put him down. Brave enough to stop deluding himself into believing he was straight. Brave enough to come out to his family. Brave enough to tell Nash how he really felt about him, instead of making him think that he didn't care about him, or most recently didn't want to be around him at all. Because in all honesty that's all he wanted to do. Be around Nash all the time. Tell him how pretty he was. Hold his hand. Whisper sweet little nothings into his ear while he snuggled him. Kiss his pink plump lips. But he couldn't. He couldn't stand the thought of putting himself out like that; making himself so vulnerable to the boy. So for now he decided to distance himself from the beautiful boy. And that was easier said than done.