Deadly Love

Chapter 17

I closed my eyes tightly and cupped my ears as the sound of the gunshots echoed. The only thought in my head was of Ben. Please not him. He wasn't supposed to die.

Surprisingly I felt nothing. No matter how many times I have thought of dying in a certain way and the feelings that will accompany death, feeling nothing was not even in the furthest corner of my imagination. I had predicted fear, panic, pain, dread and on the contrary calm and peace but nowhere had I visualized nothing. I thought you were at least supposed to feel something when you take your last breath, but in my case I wasn't even granted that. I don't know if it was a bad thing or a good thing.

This nothingness that I felt and the thought of Ben was what made me open my eyes. And I saw nothing! Weren't we supposed to see a tunnel or a white light of some sort or even see a familiar dead face of someone you love or a relative that has come to take you with them! In my case I wanted it to be my parents. I wanted to see them and hug them and apologize a thousand times to them for not being able to protect my older brother. But I was deprived of this even in my death. The concept of death didn't look so peaceful to me now.

The haze in front of my eyes cleared and I soon realized that it was the tears blocking my vision as they trailed down my cheeks. The first thing I saw, when my sight cleared were two unmoving bodies and I couldn't help my gasp in shock.

No, it wasn't my own body and Ben's. They were of the two men that had come along with Dario. They were sprawled on the ground; their eyes wide open in fear and blood seeping from the chest wounds where they were shot, the scene was horrific and gag worthy.

I swallowed painfully and looked around me, still in shock. My ears were ringing and my eyes still a little glassy. I tried to locate Ben, trying not to stare at the dead bodies again, and found him walking towards me. I still couldn't see his face clearly but knew that the lines prominent on his face were of worry. He cupped my face and wiped my eyes, trying to snap me out of my stupor. I didn't know coming this close to death again would have this affect on me.

"Jade, kiddo..." Ben's words trailed off. My ears were still ringing and it was causing me a huge discomfort. I looked at my side again and saw Dario put his gun away. I was confused! Did he kill those men? If so, why did he help us? Wasn't he supposed to kill us? Why did he go against the instructions of his boss? Why did he put his life in danger just like Emanuele and Saverio had?

My eyes went on the bodies again and I flinched and closed my eyes, turning my head back to the other side.

"I think she is in shock."

That voice made me open my eyes with a snap, the voice that I was desperate to listen to, the voice that despite everything still gives me comfort and instills a sense of security in me, that deep, baritone and haunting voice that still makes my heart flutter much to my dismay.

Emanuele also put away his gun back into the holster and stared at me with a blank look on his face. He was a few feet away from Ben and I, in his cargo pants and a tight black t-shirt.

I swayed but Ben helped me balance. "Jade." he called out to me in concern but my eyes were not on him but on Emanuele. I don't know if it was relief I should be feeling at seeing him, but that is exactly what I felt right now. He was alive and well and unharmed as I traced his body with my eyes, still in disbelief that he was standing in front of me. I wanted to apologize to him and tell him I loved him so badly. I was afraid someone else would come and rip this moment away, to finish me off or to hurt him. I didn't want to die not telling him about my feelings now that I have seen him again. I wanted to go into his arms and tell him that the concern I had for him was not fake and an act. I wanted to feel safe in his arms for the last time and then I will be ready for anything.